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How will this scholarship contribute to the organisation's human resource development needs*?

How will this scholarship contribute to the organisation's human resource development needs*? D6aR6
I plan to study geology hazards with support from this scholarship, and will benefit much towards contributing to human resource development in my institute. Because we lack technical knowledge with master's level education and who can be expert in landslide disasters management. The scholarship would help my institution to provide a hazards management expert who could implement practical skills and knowledge to develop landslides research. By studying, I will be focusing on transferring the skills and knowledge to staff by creating training and discussions about this work.
I plan to study geology hazards with support from this scholarship, and will benefit much towards contributing to human resource development in my institute.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
we lack technical knowledge with master's level education and who can be expert in landslide disasters management. The scholarship would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
my institution to provide a
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "hazards'" or "hazard's"?
hazards
management expert who could implement practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and knowledge to develop landslides research. By studying, I will be focusing on transferring the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and knowledge to staff by creating training and discussions about this work.
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IELTS essay How will this scholarship contribute to the organisation's human resource development needs*?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
87 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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