Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people believe that physical fitness of strong individuals and teams is the reason for most sports achievements. Others, however, think that mental attitude is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion v.2

Some people believe that physical fitness of strong individuals and teams is the reason for most sports achievements. Others, however, think that mental attitude is more important. 2
It is argued as to what makes an athlete or a team successful. While some believe the sheer physical fitness to be at the root of it, others claim mental toughness to be the main factor. This essay will analyse the arguments made by both camps before drawing a reasoned conclusion. Firstly, those who claim physical fitness to be the main ingredient of success base their idea on the fact that most of the athletes spend the majority of their training time on physical strength and conditioning, and they are rarely seen following any mental strengthening programs. Take the example of Rugby, where the most successful players are those that have spent the most training time in gyms working on their strength and agility, which directly translates to their better performance on the field. If one of these athletes starts spending less time at gyms than their competitors and start focusing on mental strengthening, then they might lose that extra strength advantage that they posses. Thus, this makes it clear why some people think this way. However, on the other hand, some people also believe that mental toughness is the ultimate deciding factor that separates a world-class athlete from the rest because at the highest level of sport all the participants are at same physical fitness levels. For example, in Freestyle Olympic Wresting, one of the toughest sports in the Olympics, athletes are divided into similar strength and weight classes which ensures that no single participant has any extra strength advantage over others, and the only deciding factor here is their mental attitude since at such a high level they all posses the same technical skill set. From this becomes quite evident why mental strength attitude could be the main reason for the success. To sum up, looking at the training programmes for most athletes, some people believe that physical strength is the main ingredient of success, but some of the highest levels of sports most athletes are at same physical levels and the only thing that separates champions from participants is their mental attitude which is why many believe this to be the main factor. I personally believe that mental attitude is the most important factor that makes athletes successful. It is predicted that athletes and their coaches will realize this and incorporate mental strengthening programs in their training routines.
It
is argued
as to what
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athlete
or a team successful. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
the sheer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
fitness to be at the root of it, others claim
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
toughness to be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
. This essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
the arguments made by both camps
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
drawing a reasoned conclusion.

Firstly
, those who claim
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
fitness to be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
ingredient of success base their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
on the fact that most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
spend the majority of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
time on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
and conditioning, and they are rarely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
following any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
strengthening programs. Take the example of Rugby, where the most successful players are those that have spent the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
time in gyms working on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
and agility, which
directly
translates to their better performance on the field. If one of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
spending less time at gyms than their competitors and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
focusing on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
strengthening, then they might lose that extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
advantage that
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they posses
.
Thus
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this way.

However
,
on the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
toughness is the ultimate deciding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
that separates a world-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athlete
from the rest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
at the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
of sport all the participants are at same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
fitness
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
.
For example
, in Freestyle Olympic Wresting, one of the toughest sports in the Olympics,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
are divided
into similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
and weight classes which ensures that no single participant has any extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
advantage over others, and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
deciding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
here is their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attitude
since at such a high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
they all posses the same technical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
set. From this becomes quite evident why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attitude
could be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
reason for the success.

To sum up, looking at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
for most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
ingredient of success,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
of sports most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
are at same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thing that separates champions from participants is their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attitude
which is why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
this to be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
. I
personally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attitude
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
successful. It
is predicted
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
and their coaches will realize this and incorporate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
strengthening programs in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
routines.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that physical fitness of strong individuals and teams is the reason for most sports achievements. Others, however, think that mental attitude is more important. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
391 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts