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Some people believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. Others, however, believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are 6 or 7 years old. v.6

Some people believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. Others, however, believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are 6 or 7 years old. v. 6
Children are the good creation of God and parents like a gardener. Some people think that toddlers learn very quickly if they send in an early age to school. On the other side of coin that pupil's grasp quickly at home. In the following paragraphs, I will shed both the views and support my opinion. To begin with, parents are the first and the best teachers of infants. There are a lot of traits which can be learnt only by parents. For example, patience, culture and obedience. As a result, it will be helpful for the school teacher to handle the student in a better way if he/she goes to school daily. Moreover, the junior should play unless they reach at a certain age. Like, the mental ability can be increased in an early age by playing creative games such as chess. Furthermore, children can learn more things from their siblings. On the flip side, it is the fact that school like a temple and plays a vital role to build a number of abilities and creativities among the youngsters. As if, schools use innovative methods to teach kids, which is always etched in brains for a lifetime. Besides this, the certain subjects such as 'English' and 'Mathematics' are not only taught by schools, but ethical aspects are also given by in school campus. Additionally, one important thing is that teamwork is learned by schools which could create the feeling of unity among them. To sum up, it can be said that both sides have their own merits to build a creative and intelligent person in the future. In my opinion, the most of the things are learnt by schools as compared to home. Decisions should be taken by understanding the behaviour of the child.
Children are the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
creation of God and parents like a gardener.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that toddlers learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
in an early age to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. On the other side of coin that pupil's grasp
quickly
at home. In the following paragraphs, I will shed both the views and support my opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, parents are the
first
and the best teachers of infants. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
traits which can be
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by parents.
For example
, patience, culture and obedience.
As a result
, it will be helpful for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
teacher to handle the student in a better way if he/she goes to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
daily.
Moreover
, the junior should play unless they reach at a certain age. Like, the mental ability can
be increased
in an early age by playing creative games such as chess.
Furthermore
, children can learn more things from their siblings.

On the flip side, it is the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
like a temple and plays a vital role to build a number of abilities and
Possible spelling mistake found.
creativities
among the youngsters. As if,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
innovative methods to teach kids, which is always etched in brains for a lifetime.
Besides
this, the certain subjects such as 'English' and 'Mathematics' are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
taught by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
ethical aspects are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
campus.
Additionally
, one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing is that teamwork
is learned
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
which could create the feeling of unity among them.

To sum up, it can
be said
that both sides have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
merits to build a creative and intelligent person in the future. In my opinion, the most of the things are
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
as compared to home. Decisions should
be taken
by understanding the
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of the child.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. Others, however, believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are 6 or 7 years old. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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