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some people believe that people need to live simpler to environmental problems. others believe that technology is the way to slove them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

some people believe that people need to live simpler to environmental problems. others believe that technology is the way to slove them. KGVmN
People hold different views in regard to way to tackle environmental pollution. While it is claimed that living simple is the measure for this problem, I would argue that only technological advances can deal with this. On the one hand, there are some main reasons in support of the view that people merely live simple to handle environmental problems. Firstly, commuters can travel by public transport instead of private vehicles to reduce gas emissions. These emissions probably break down the ozone layer which helps to prevent our exposure to harmful UV rays. Besides, carbon dioxide gases discharged cause greenhouse effects, leading to global warming. Secondly, turning off electrical devices is a good way to save the environment. A significant percentage of electricity in the world comes from non-renewable energy such as fossil fuel and nuclear power. Coal was burned to produce electricity, releasing various emissions such as carbon dioxide or dust. Therefore, turning off electrical appliances when people do not use can cut down the air pollution. On the other hand, . First, technology can solve the environmental pollution from their origin. Today, people cannot stop energy production or vehicles so it is better to invent machines which treat discard in an environment-friendly way. For instance, an enterprise in Japan filters waste by using a kind of bacteria to decay plastic bottles before disposing to nature. A group of scientists said that this was the solution for saving the environment. Secondly, people only can rely on technological phenomenon to reborn extinct creatures. Biodiversity plays a crucial role in wildlife due to the fact that if a creature disappear, the ecological imbalance will happen. Scientists have been researching to figure out how to maintain biodiversity because humans absolutely cannot live a simple way to recover extinct species. IN CONCLUSION, a wide range of good grounds for both given views have just been taken into account. As far as I am concerned, I am of the opinion that the idea that technology is an efficient way.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
hold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views in regard to way to tackle environmental pollution. While it
is claimed
that living simple is the measure for this problem, I would argue that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
technological advances can deal with this.

On the one hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
main reasons in support of the view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
merely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
simple to handle environmental problems.
Firstly
, commuters can travel by public transport
instead
of private vehicles to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
gas emissions. These emissions
probably
break down the ozone layer which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
our exposure to harmful UV rays.
Besides
, carbon dioxide gases discharged cause greenhouse effects, leading to global warming.
Secondly
, turning off electrical devices is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to save the environment. A significant percentage of electricity in the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from non-renewable energy such as fossil fuel and nuclear power. Coal
was burned
to produce electricity, releasing various emissions such as carbon dioxide or dust.
Therefore
, turning off electrical appliances when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down the air pollution.

On the other hand
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
First
, technology can solve the environmental pollution from their origin.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
energy production or vehicles
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is better to invent machines which treat discard in an environment-friendly way.
For instance
, an enterprise in Japan filters waste by using a kind of bacteria to decay plastic bottles
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
disposing to nature. A group of scientists said that this was the solution for saving the environment.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can rely on technological phenomenon to reborn extinct creatures. Biodiversity plays a crucial role in wildlife due to the fact that if a creature disappear, the ecological imbalance will happen. Scientists have been researching to figure out how to maintain biodiversity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
humans
absolutely
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a simple way to recover extinct species.

IN CONCLUSION
, a wide range of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
grounds for both
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
views have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
been taken
into account. As far as I
am concerned
, I am of the opinion that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that technology is an efficient way.
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IELTS essay some people believe that people need to live simpler to environmental problems. others believe that technology is the way to slove them.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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