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Some people believe that online reading materials should only be used for a child to learn to read, whereas others believe only printed material should be used. Discuss both views and give your opinion. 40 mins v.2

Some people believe that online reading materials should only be used for a child to learn to read, whereas others believe only printed material should be used. 40 mins v. 2
The ability to read is significantly required to survive in this modern era. Some people deem that children should develop this skill through online resources. I would agree with those who promote the use of traditional books for enhancing the reading strength. As per the opponents, resources available online have a huge variety of topics and adolescents can take advantage of such an opportunity. This is because this could be the fastest and convenient way to get such knowledge, as there is no requirement to print and deliver, which also contributes positively to the environment. For instance, Wikipedia, an online encyclopedia offers reading material for children, which help them expand their horizons, and preventing them from violence and drug-related topics. Furthermore, online topics are followed by interactive tests and games, which would be helpful for children to grasp that knowledge and retain this for long periods. However, the reliability is still questionable because of the diversity of topics and cultural variations which means that it would be difficult to monitor the content for parents, teachers and even the governments. Nevertheless, the content in paper-based books are more reliable because the publishers have to go through standard procedures to publish such books. This means that the books is reviewed by the designated bodies, and after their approval the book is published. In contrast, websites offering knowledge-based articles might mislead their readers through false information. Another benefit paper-books is that they put less strain on eyesight as compared to computer screens, meaning that there are less chances that children will suffer from the symptoms of poor vision. In conclusion, although online resources have more variety and interactive learning methodologies, I believe that the reliability is the predominant factor and so the books appear to be more beneficial for children to enhance their reading capability.
The ability to read is
significantly
required to survive in this modern era.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
deem that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should develop this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
resources. I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with those who promote the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
for enhancing the reading strength.

As per the opponents, resources available
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
have a huge variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
and adolescents can take advantage of such an opportunity. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this could be the fastest and convenient way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
such knowledge, as there is no requirement to print and deliver, which
also
contributes
positively
to the environment.
For instance
, Wikipedia, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
encyclopedia offers reading material for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them expand their horizons, and preventing them from violence and drug-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
are followed
by interactive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
and games, which would be helpful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to grasp that knowledge and retain this for long periods.
However
, the reliability is
still
questionable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the diversity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
and cultural variations which means that it would be difficult to monitor the content for parents, teachers and even the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
.

Nevertheless
, the content in paper-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are more reliable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the publishers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go through standard procedures to publish such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. This means that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
is reviewed
by the designated bodies, and after their approval the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
is published
.
In contrast
, websites offering knowledge-based articles might mislead their readers through false information. Another benefit paper-books is that they put less strain on eyesight as compared to computer screens, meaning that there are
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun chances is countable.
less
chances that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will suffer from the symptoms of poor vision.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
resources have more variety and interactive learning methodologies, I believe that the reliability is the predominant factor and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
appear to be more beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to enhance their reading capability.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that online reading materials should only be used for a child to learn to read, whereas others believe only printed material should be used. 40 mins v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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