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Some people believe that long prison sentences can reduce crime while others think that there are better alternative options for the same. Discuss both the view and give your opinion

Some people believe that long prison sentences can reduce crime while others think that there are better alternative options for the same. Discuss both the view and give your opinion GLA0Q
Crime rates are tremendously increasing day by day. Lack of strict rules and lack of moral values are the primary reasons for this rise. There is a belief among many people that crime rates can be reduced by giving criminals long sentences in prison. Whereas, there is another view that better alternative measures can be used in the reduction of crimes. I strongly agree with the latter view, except that I prefer using both hand in hand. There are numerous advantages in broadening the span of prison life. Hence, prisoners will get more time re-evaluate their deeds and a lot of room is there for re-education and training them to get out of this criminal aura. Moreover, this alteration can bring in fear among the others being conscious of the long prison life they have to encounter after committing a crime. For instance, the rules in Saudi Arabia is very strict and people know that once they enter the jail there it is equivalent to imprisonment till death. Consequently, even the people reaching there for jobs or other purposes are always careful not to be a cause of trouble in any ways. Apart from long prison sentences, there are other better options to cut down crime rates. Firstly, Imposition of strict laws and punishment practices can eventually reduce crime rates. Nevertheless, death sentences, slap punishment, long term imprisonment, strict punishments for even small crimes will make people think twice before proceeding with crime. Also, people should be made aware of the changes of the same. The other better option is conducting self-awareness programmes everywhere from child to old to build in moral values and to think about others before doing a crime. In addition, effective monitoring and patrolling by police force and public can decrease the probability of crimes. To conclude, in my perspective, even if long prison sentences can effectively reduce crimes to some extent, the use of this method in conjunction with the other better options can contribute to the prevention of crimes successfully.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
are
tremendously
increasing day by day. Lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and lack of moral values are the primary reasons for this rise. There is a belief among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
by giving criminals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentences
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, there is another view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
alternative measures can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in the reduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the latter view, except that I prefer using both hand in hand.

There are numerous advantages in broadening the span of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
life.
Hence
, prisoners will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more time re-evaluate their deeds and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
room is there for re-education and training them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
out of this criminal aura.
Moreover
, this alteration can bring in fear among the others being conscious of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
life they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
encounter after committing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
For instance
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
in Saudi Arabia is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strict
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
know that once they enter the jail there it is equivalent to imprisonment till death.
Consequently
, even the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
reaching there for jobs or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
purposes are always careful not to be a cause of trouble in any ways.

Apart from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentences
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
options to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
.
Firstly
, Imposition of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strict
laws and punishment practices can
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
.
Nevertheless
, death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentences
, slap punishment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
term imprisonment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strict
punishments for even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
twice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
proceeding with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
be made
aware of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
of the same. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
option is conducting self-awareness
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
everywhere from child to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
to build in moral values and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about others
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
doing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
In addition
, effective monitoring and patrolling by police force and public can decrease the probability of crimes.

To conclude
, in my perspective, even if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentences
can
effectively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of this method in conjunction with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
options can contribute to the prevention of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
successfully
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that long prison sentences can reduce crime while others think that there are better alternative options for the same. Discuss both the view and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
336 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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