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Some people believe that lessons on becoming a good parent should be included in school curriculums. Others think that it is not essential for students. Discuss both opinions and give your opinion. v.1

Some people believe that lessons on becoming a good parent should be included in school curriculums. Others think that it is not essential for students. v. 1
Recently, the Ministry of Education has begun to analyse and evaluate school curriculums because they are trying to immerse more social and life experiences in a subject which student study in schools nowadays, good parenting values and methods is one of the suggested ideas. While a lot of people believe that teaching young students these values will have a huge positive influence on their life, other people think it might be early to start teaching students these values and recommend that school curriculums must focus more on science and math. In the last few years, the number of divorce cases increased in alarming way between couples who recently have a newborn. Studies and research reflect that one of the reasons could be the poor knowledge of parenting responsibilities and effects. For example, Women suffer a many depression symptoms and physical pain during and after pregnancy, therefore families start to face tension and problems that may end up in divorce. Similarly, men also could tackle a lot of obstacles when they have newborn, there is no doubt that we are living in fast-pace and demanding life needs a lot of mental and physical effort to cope up with it, to illustrate, many fathers have to work a night shift job or working extra time to cover the financial expenses, therefore fathers will have to stay out working most of the time leaving whole the maternity responsibilities rested on mothers, thus also may reflect to huge collateral effects on new families. In conclusion, I strongly recommend teaching parenting values to teenagers in our schools will make them notice the big efforts made by their parents and also prepare them for a real-life experience such as the stress come along with pregnancy and other problems they might face in future.
Recently, the Ministry of Education has begun to
analyse
and evaluate
school
curriculums
because
they are trying to immerse more social and life experiences in a subject which student study in
schools
nowadays,
good
parenting values and methods is one of the suggested
ideas
. While
a lot of
people
believe that teaching young students these values will have a huge
positive
influence on their life, other
people
think
it might be early to
start
teaching students these values and recommend that
school
curriculums
must
focus more on science and math.

In the last few years, the number of divorce cases increased in alarming way between couples who recently have a newborn. Studies and research reflect that one of the reasons could be the poor knowledge of parenting responsibilities and effects.
For example
, Women suffer a
many
depression symptoms and physical pain during and after pregnancy,
therefore
families
start
to face tension and problems that may
end
up in divorce.

Similarly
,
men
also
could tackle
a lot of
obstacles when they have newborn, there is no doubt that we are living in
fast
-pace and demanding life needs
a lot of
mental and physical effort to cope up with it, to illustrate,
many
fathers
have to
work a night shift job or working extra time to cover the financial expenses,
therefore
fathers will
have to
stay out working most of the time leaving whole the maternity responsibilities rested on mothers,
thus
also
may reflect to huge collateral effects on new families.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
recommend teaching parenting values to
teenagers
in our
schools
will
make
them notice the
big
efforts made by their parents and
also
prepare them for a real-life experience such as the
stress
come
along with pregnancy and other problems they might face
in future
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that lessons on becoming a good parent should be included in school curriculums. Others think that it is not essential for students. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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