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Some people believe that if people are allowed to work after 60, it would cause problems for younger people. Do you agree or disagree.

Some people believe that if people are allowed to work after 60, it would cause problems for younger people. l9qW
It is often believed by a few sections of society that younger generation would be impacted if senior citizens are allowed to work in their old age. Although this might be a prevalent conviction among some people, my perspective is that, letting aged people work after 60 years of age will not pose any problem for younger workforce. This essay will decipher various reasons for my standpoint. Firstly, aging significantly affect the cognitive abilities, analytical skills and reasoning capacity of human beings. In other words, Brain functionality of a person may slow down with time and this directly results in poor productivity at work. To instantiate, in a recent study it was found that humans are more susceptible to brain damage and nervous disorders after the age of 60 which mark the decline in exceptional performance in their field of work. However, this may not be the case with youths as they are considered to be adept at work rate. Therefore, letting senior citizen work after certain age will not affect the younger people, as the former cannot considered as a thereat to the more capable younger working class. Secondly, elderly people find it arduous to quick learn new technology. This is because, Previous century as opposed to the current century, never experienced the fast pace of evolving business, so this provided no opportunity for the workers during that time to adapt to the changes. For instance, in many organizations, when application that work on oldest technology are decommissioned, older employees to swiftly comprehend and are more sensitive to changes. In contrast, the younger working class have always showed extreme positive involvement to these variations which makes them more preferable to employability. Hence, allowing elderly people to work cannot pose any problem to younger generation. To recapitulate, due to various age relating challenges such as declining health, slower learning, poor adapting skills, I believe that the presence of old people in the job market will not offer any challenge to prospects of younger generation. Therefore, older people, if allowed to work after 60 years of age, would not cause problems to younger age group.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
believed by a few sections of society that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generation would
be impacted
if senior citizens are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
. Although this might be a prevalent conviction among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, my perspective is that, letting aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
after 60 years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
will not pose any problem for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
workforce. This essay will decipher various reasons for my standpoint.
Firstly
, aging
significantly
affect the cognitive abilities, analytical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and reasoning capacity of human beings.
In other words
, Brain functionality of a person may slow down with time and this
directly
results in poor productivity at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. To instantiate, in a recent study it
was found
that humans are more susceptible to brain damage and nervous disorders after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 60 which mark the decline in exceptional performance in their field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
However
, this may not be the case with youths as they
are considered
to be adept at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
rate.
Therefore
, letting senior citizen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
after certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
will not affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, as the former cannot
The verb 'cannot' requires the base form of the verb: "consider"
considered
as a thereat to the more capable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
.

Secondly
, elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
find it arduous to
The word "quick" is an adjective and doesn't fit in this context. Did you mean the adverb "quickly"?
quick
learn new technology. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, Previous century as opposed to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
century, never experienced the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
pace of evolving business,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this provided no opportunity for the workers during that time to adapt to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
.
For instance
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
organizations, when application that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on oldest technology
are decommissioned
, older employees to
swiftly
comprehend and are more sensitive to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
.
In contrast
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
have always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
extreme
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
involvement to these variations which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them more preferable to employability.
Hence
, allowing elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
cannot pose any problem to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generation.

To recapitulate, due to various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
relating challenges such as declining health, slower learning, poor adapting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, I believe that the presence of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the job market will not offer any challenge to prospects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generation.
Therefore
, older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
after 60 years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
, would not cause problems to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that if people are allowed to work after 60, it would cause problems for younger people.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
354 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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