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Some people believe that history has no value in the contemporary world. But some believe that we still need history to learn from the past.

History is a source of knowledge, because history told us about the past and history could give us a lot of help how to do something, or how to face something. History has a value because it was about how this life's going before we became who we are today. We need to learn history because it could make us remembered something important, like an independence day of one country, the revolution that started many years ago, and all of the evolution that happened. In this contemporary world, there are no permanent things but the tragedy that we face right now probably same like the tragedy of the old people had faced before, and with history we could face it. For example, in 1920 there were a pandemic called spanish flu. It was a pandemic because there weren't any medicine that could be use to cure the disease. To prevent the spread of spanish flu, the people were used face mask to make sure they weren't sick due to the disease because that is the least they could do. Right now, in 2021 we're facing pandemic called COVID-19. We could say it looks like the spanish flu pandemic because there aren't any medicine that could be use to treat this and the vaccine is not so promising because to achieve an ideal vaccine we should wait around 10 years, so the least we could do is learned from the past which is wearing a face mask. However not all of the problems could be solved using history, such as today if we couldn't attend a meeting we only send a chat to our boss, say if we're sick and couldn't join the meeting. It has a different case with the past, when we were sick we should wrote a letter first, then sent it by gave it to a postman hoping our boss accept our letter. All in all, history is an important things in our live, because there some proverb says that the earth is rotating and i do believe that we will face something that already happened before.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is a source of knowledge,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
us about the past and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
could give us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
how to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
, or how to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
has a value
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it was about how this life's going
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
we became who we are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. We need to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us remembered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, like an
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
independence day
of one country, the revolution that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years ago, and
Consider using “all the”.
all of the
evolution that happened.

In this contemporary world, there are no permanent things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the tragedy that we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
probably
same like the tragedy of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
had faced
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, and with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
we could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
it.
For example
, in 1920 there were a pandemic called
Possible spelling mistake found.
spanish
flu. It was a pandemic
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there weren't any medicine that could be
Make sure that ‘use to’ is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean ‘accustomed to’, use “used to”.
use to
cure the disease. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the spread of
Possible spelling mistake found.
spanish
flu, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
mask to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure they weren't sick due to the disease
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that is
the least they could do.

Right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, in 2021 we're facing pandemic called COVID-19. We could say it looks like the
Possible spelling mistake found.
spanish
flu pandemic
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there aren't any medicine that could be
Make sure that ‘use to’ is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean ‘accustomed to’, use “used to”.
use to
treat this and the vaccine is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
promising
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
to achieve an ideal vaccine we should wait around 10 years,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the least we could do
is learned
from the past which is wearing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
mask.

However
not
Consider using “all the”.
all of the
problems could
be solved
using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, such as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
if we couldn't attend a meeting we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
a chat to our boss, say if we're sick and couldn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the meeting. It has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
case with the past, when we were sick we should
The modal verb ‘should’ requires the verb’s base form.
wrote
a letter
first
, then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
it by gave it to a postman hoping our boss accept our letter.

All in all,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
proverb says that the earth is rotating and
Is this the personal pronoun “I”? It is spelled uppercase.
i
do believe that we will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
that already happened
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that history has no value in the contemporary world. But some believe that we still need history to learn from the past.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
350 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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