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Some people believe that governments should spend on new public buildings, such as libraries and museums, rather than renovating old buildings. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people believe that governments should spend on new public buildings, such as libraries and museums, rather than renovating old buildings. v. 1
Whether the government should restore old buildings or not has always sparked a heated debate. Some people argue that instead of restoring old buildings, the government should build new roads and other structures. While I admit that restoration of ancient buildings involves a huge amount of money, spending on them is as important as building new roads and structures. There are numerous reasons to support this view point. First of all, the old buildings depict our history and culture of people of ancient times. For example, the architecture and artistic work of old buildings are rare to find nowadays. Hence, they must be conserved. Moreover, we must preserve historical constructions for our future generations and understand that even if one piece is destroyed, it is destroyed forever. These buildings have their own character which we can’t replicate in modern architecture. Another benefit of preserving these heritage buildings is that they can be converted into tourist attractions. However, in spite of these benefits, there are some analysts who argue that it is more important to spend money on constructing new infrastructure rather than renovate old buildings. According to them, the hard earned money they give to the government in the form of taxes must be spent on something that is beneficial to them like new roads or flyovers. Since renovations involve a huge amount of money, they feel new buildings should be constructed as per the modern architecture and needs of the society. In conclusion, although preserving ancient buildings involves a substantial amount of money, I insist that they must be preserved because they are reminders of our culture and heritage.
Whether the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should restore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
or not has always sparked a heated debate.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that
instead
of restoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should build
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
roads and other structures. While I admit that restoration of ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
involves a huge amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, spending on them is as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
roads and structures.

There are numerous reasons to support this view point.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
depict our history and culture of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of ancient times.
For example
, the architecture and artistic work of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
are rare to find nowadays.
Hence
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be conserved
.
Moreover
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
preserve historical constructions for our future generations and understand that even if one piece is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
forever. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
character which we can’t replicate in modern architecture. Another benefit of preserving these heritage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
is that they can
be converted
into tourist attractions.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
in spite of
these benefits, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
analysts who argue that it is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on constructing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
infrastructure
rather
than renovate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
. According to them, the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
hard earned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
they give to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in the form of taxes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be spent
on something
that is
beneficial to them like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
roads or flyovers. Since renovations involve a huge amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, they feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
should
be constructed
as per the modern architecture and needs of the society.

In conclusion
, although preserving ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
involves a substantial amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, I insist that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be preserved
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are reminders of our culture and heritage.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Some people believe that governments should spend on new public buildings, such as libraries and museums, rather than renovating old buildings. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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