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Some people believe that elder employees are more useful to a company, while others believe that young employees are better. Discuss both views and give your opinion? v.2

Some people believe that elder employees are more useful to a company, while others believe that young employees are better. v. 2
Nowadays it is debatable issue for the communities which employees are suitable for the business senior or adults. However, section of society in the favour of grey-haired workers because they have roots of business, profound in knowledge and more patience. Whilst, other support young people the reason is that they have familiar with modern technologies, more energetic, new generation as well. Moreover, this easy will shed lights on both perceptions along with my prospective. The one school of thought consider that older employees are better for industries and providing lots of profits in various manners to companies. Moving further, the main is that senior workers are the roots of the companies because they have founder of those industries. In addition to this, they not only built up businesses but also paid vast amount of efforts in the progressing of these. According to this, they have well familiar with the weakest and strongest points belonging to their companies so in that case it is right to say that they have deeper experience about their industries rather than others. In contrast, grey-hired employees are more patience according their age as compared with younger. As a result, they can eligible to handle the complication situations wisely due to their silent behaviour. For example, today Anil Ambani is famous Indian old businessman with the help of old techniques and silent as well as sweet nature. The another school of thought claims that young employees are crucial and mandatory for the growth of the businesses with great factors. Furthermore, an initial is that, it is generally said that adults are the pillars and future of the regions. Additionally, they have well engaged with the modern world so that is why they have huge knowledge about the latest technologies. Due to these, they can expand these gadgets and methods very comfortably and conveniently for the drastic increase into companies’ status. On the other hand, youngsters are the new generation of the world as well as more energetic than elder humans so in that case they offer large proportion of encouragement to their work to touch the stairs of success. For instance, Mark Zukharbargh founder of Facebook is most popular in the worldwide with the aid of modern technology. In my notion, employees are the backbone of the companies who take their businesses to peak level of success with their hard work. So, in my view, they both give their best for the betterment of companies so that is why they both are good for the growth of industries. In conclusion, although, new generation is adopting so many latest ways which lead to gain higher level of achievements in the business. In other words, sometimes vast knowledge and patience nature is required to deal with customers which provided by elderly workers.
Nowadays it is debatable issue for the communities which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are suitable for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
senior or adults.
However
, section of society in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
grey-haired
workers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have roots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
, profound in knowledge and more patience. Whilst,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
support young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
the reason is that they have familiar with modern technologies, more energetic, new generation as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
.
Moreover
, this easy will shed lights on both perceptions along with my prospective.

The one school of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
consider that older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are better for industries and providing lots of profits in various manners to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
. Moving
further
, the main is that senior workers are the roots of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have founder of those industries.
In addition
to this, they not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
built up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
paid vast amount of efforts in the progressing of these. According to this, they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
familiar with the weakest and strongest points belonging to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
in that case
it is right to say that they have deeper experience about their industries
rather
than others.
In contrast
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
grey-hired
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are more patience according their age as compared with younger.
As a result
, they
The word 'eligible' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
can eligible
to handle the complication situations
wisely
due to their silent
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
Anil
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ambani
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Indian
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
businessman with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
techniques and silent as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as sweet nature.

The another school of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
claims that young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are crucial and mandatory for the growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
with great factors.
Furthermore
, an initial is that, it is
generally
said that adults are the pillars and future of the regions.
Additionally
, they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
engaged with the modern world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that is
why they have huge knowledge about the latest technologies. Due to these, they can expand these gadgets and methods
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
comfortably
and
conveniently
for the drastic increase into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies’
status. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, youngsters are the new generation of the world as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as more energetic than elder humans
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
in that case
they offer large proportion of encouragement to their work to touch the stairs of success.
For instance
, Mark
Possible spelling mistake found.
Zukharbargh
founder of Facebook is most popular in the worldwide with the aid of modern technology.

In my notion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are the backbone of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
who take their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
to peak level of success with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in my view, they both give their best for the betterment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that is
why they both are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the growth of industries.

In conclusion
, although, new generation is adopting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
latest ways which lead to gain higher level of achievements in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
vast knowledge and patience nature
is required
to deal with customers which provided by elderly workers.
29Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that elder employees are more useful to a company, while others believe that young employees are better. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
464 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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