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Some people believe that children using computers daily has more disadvantages than advantages. Do you agree or disagree?

It is often argued by some that regular use of computer by minors can impart more harmful than beneficial impacts on them. Although some might disagree, I completely agree with this notion. I believe so not only because by using computer daily young ones become less social and develope multiple health problems but also because their focus on study is reduced. This essay will explore how usage of computers on daily basis can have more negative than positive effects. There are multiple negative aspects associated with use of computers. Firstly, a compelling factor advocating my point of view is the attribution of having anti-social attitude to children. In other words, minors avoid socialization owing to addiction of using computers regularly. A recent research report released by Institute of Behavioral Sciences in Berlin, for instance, features a shocking fact that minors using computers regularly usually lack social skills due to being away from social activities. Thus, to be anti-social is a negative impact of regular computer usage. Secondly, multiple health issues have generally been observed in young ones using computers daily. If a child develops the habit of regular usage of computers, he will be unable to participate in physical activities which would lead him to developing health problems. Take an example of a recent article published in European Health Journal, by a renowned child physician, Dr Albert Bandura, which highlighted that a major proportion of children with backbone issues were found to be a regular user of computers. Hence, daily use of computers affects health of minors negatively. Finally, study of children gets neglected if they become a regular user of computers. This is because, they become weak academically. To sum-up, even though there might be some positive impacts of daily use of computers, but I believe this development has more negative effects not only in terms of making children less social and developing health issues but also in terms of diverting their attention from studies.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that
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regular
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of computer by
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minors
can impart more harmful than beneficial impacts on them. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
might disagree, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this notion. I believe
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so
not
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only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
by using computer
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daily
young
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ones
become less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
and
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develope
multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their focus on study is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. This essay will explore how usage of computers on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
basis can have more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects.

There are multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
aspects associated with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of computers.
Firstly
, a compelling factor advocating my point of view is the attribution of having anti-social attitude to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minors
avoid socialization owing to addiction of using computers
regularly
. A recent research report released by Institute of Behavioral Sciences in Berlin,
for instance
, features a shocking fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minors
using computers
regularly
usually
lack
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
due to being away from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
activities.
Thus
, to be anti-social is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regular
computer usage.

Secondly
, multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues have
generally
been observed
in young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
using computers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
. If a child develops the habit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regular
usage of computers, he will be unable to participate in physical activities which would lead him to developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems. Take an example of a recent article published in European
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
Journal, by a renowned child physician, Dr Albert
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bandura
, which highlighted that a major proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
with backbone issues
were found
to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regular
user of computers.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of computers affects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minors
negatively
.

Finally
, study of
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children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
neglected if they become a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regular
user of computers. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, they become weak
academically
.

To sum-up,
even though
there might be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of computers,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe this development has more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effects not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in terms of making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
and developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in terms of diverting their attention from studies.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that children using computers daily has more disadvantages than advantages.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
326 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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