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Some people believe that all jobs will be replaced by artificially intelligent robots. Discuss your opinion v.2

Some people believe that all jobs will be replaced by artificially intelligent robots. Discuss your opinion v. 2
The era has come where technology has become integral and inevitable part of human life. Introduction of some technology like artificial intelligence have already started replacing the man operated works. I partially agree with the fact that robots would replace all kinds of human intervention. Manual jobs have been replaced by Artificial intelligence up to some extent. Several reasons can be seen for this. Where manual tasks are prone to human error as compared to machine operated jobs, on the other hand, robots once programmed, can be banked upon for successful completion with 100% accuracy. Instead of incurring millions and billions of money on distributing salary and perks of employees, robots can be placed to save this huge expenditure and this will show an increase in profit of the company's graph. Though robots may be a boon for many companies and industries, there are jobs which are irreplaceable like the job of a soldier. Prior predictions are not possible in such tasks and prompt action is required to be taken. Army personnels are deployed in such a remote and difficult locations where robots may not be able to survive for extended periods. For example, Robots may become dysfunctional in locations like Siachen border where the temperature reaches -70°C. Also, installing them at such remote locations would require a lot of money as well. To conclude, though artificially intelligent robots can be thought of as an intelligent option to replace humans from many jobs, but complete removal of human intervention is not possible.
The era has
come
where technology has become integral and inevitable part of
human
life. Introduction of
some
technology
like artificial intelligence have already
started
replacing the
man
operated works. I
partially
agree with the fact that
robots would replace all kinds of
human
intervention.

Manual
jobs
have
been replaced
by Artificial intelligence up to
some
extent. Several reasons can be
seen
for this. Where manual tasks are prone to
human
error as compared to machine operated
jobs
,
on the other hand
, robots once programmed, can
be banked
upon for successful completion with 100% accuracy.
Instead
of incurring millions and billions of money on distributing salary and perks of employees, robots can
be placed
to save this huge expenditure and this will
show
an increase in profit of the
company
's graph.

Though robots may be a boon for
many
companies
and industries, there are
jobs
which are irreplaceable like the
job
of a soldier. Prior predictions are not possible in such
tasks


and
prompt action
is required
to
be taken
. Army
personnels
are deployed
in such a remote and difficult locations where robots may not be able to survive for extended periods.
For example
, Robots may become dysfunctional in locations like
Siachen
border where the temperature reaches
-70°C
.
Also
, installing them at such remote locations would require
a lot of
money
as well
.

To conclude
, though
artificially
intelligent robots can be
thought
of as an intelligent option to replace
humans
from
many
jobs
,
but
complete removal of
human
intervention is not possible.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that all jobs will be replaced by artificially intelligent robots. Discuss your opinion v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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