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Some people believe owning a home is important than renting one

Some people believe owning a home is important than renting one 73nm6
The importance of owning a home rather than renting one is debatable. Most people around the world believe that it is essential to own a home. In my perspective, it has more positive effects than negative ones. This essay will discuss why owning a home is crucial than renting one. One of the core reasons is that purchasing a home means investing in a long-term investment and having a sense of increased financial security. For example, in many parts of the world, for most people, their primary goal is to own a home because owning a home indirectly contributes towards the stability of a family. While it also helps to enhance the societal status by owning a real estate property. Moreover, it lessens the monthly burden of paying rent on individuals. Another reason is that owning a home in specific countries substantially decreases the percentage of tax deductions. In addition to the usual working wages, the owner can further rent out their properties which helps to have an additional source of passive income. Besides this, in the future, the owner can also renew the home according to the newer trends and sell it for a higher profit. In conclusion, owning a home is an innate desire which helps to create a sense of ownership and financial security in the long run.
The importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a home
rather
than renting one is debatable. Most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around the world believe that it is essential to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
a home. In my perspective, it has more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
ones. This essay will discuss why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a home is
Use "(crucial)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
crucial
than renting one.

One of the core reasons is that purchasing a home means investing in a long-term investment and having a sense of increased financial security.
For example
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parts of the world, for most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, their primary goal is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
a home
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a home
indirectly
contributes towards the stability of a family.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
it
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to enhance the societal status by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a real estate property.
Moreover
, it lessens the monthly burden of paying rent on individuals.

Another reason is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a home in specific countries
substantially
decreases the percentage of tax deductions.
In addition
to the usual working wages, the owner can
further
rent out their properties which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to have an additional source of passive income.
Besides
this, in the future, the owner can
also
renew the home according to the newer trends and sell it for a higher profit.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a home is an innate desire which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to create a sense of ownership and financial security in the long run.
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IELTS essay Some people believe owning a home is important than renting one

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
221 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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