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Many people tend to choose not to take vaccines. Many people believe that it is crucial to inoculate everyone for safety purposes To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people tend to choose not to take vaccines. Many people believe that it is crucial to inoculate everyone for safety purposes 9wnd7
It is often argued that people ought to take vaccines to shield themselves from the infection while others feel that taking one isn't critical for our wellbeing. In my opinion, I completely agree that people should take immunizations to ensure everyone's safety. On one hand, taking vaccines is extremely good for preventing infections. People who are vaccinated hardly take any form of diseases if they took the right amount and the right kinds of vaccine. It creates a very small portion of the virus, enough to not make us get sick. With that amount, our body can train to fight the infection off and wont have any trouble when we meet it again from the outside in a bigger form of disease. That’s why we should take vaccines, especially when we are young. Secondly, the ingredients in vaccines are safe in the amounts used. Ingredients, such as thimerosal, formaldehyde, and aluminum, can be harmful in large doses but they are not used in harmful quantities in vaccines. Children are exposed to more bacteria, viruses, toxins, and other harmful substances in one day of normal activity than are in vaccines. Adding to the first idea, taking a vaccine is the perfect solution for preventing infections. In conclusions, taking vaccines is essential to vaccinate everybody for security purposes in view of how brilliant it can ensure us and the way people make vaccine is completely safe for human being
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
ought to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
to shield themselves from the infection while others feel that taking one isn't critical for our
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
.

In my opinion, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should take immunizations to ensure everyone's safety.

On one hand, taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
is
extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for preventing infections.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who
are vaccinated
hardly take any form of diseases if they took the right amount and the right kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccine
. It creates a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
portion of the virus,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
sick. With that amount, our body can train to fight the infection off and
Please make sure you mean 'wont' (a habit), not "won't"/"won’t" (short for 'will not')?
wont
have any trouble when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
it again from the outside in a bigger form of disease. That’s why we should take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
,
especially
when we are young.

Secondly
, the ingredients in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
are safe in the amounts
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
. Ingredients, such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
thimerosal
, formaldehyde, and aluminum, can be harmful in large doses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in harmful quantities in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
. Children
are exposed
to more bacteria, viruses, toxins, and other harmful substances in one day of normal activity than are in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
. Adding to the
first
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccine
is the perfect solution for preventing infections.

In conclusions, taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
is essential to vaccinate everybody for security purposes in view of how brilliant it can ensure us and the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccine
is completely safe for human being

IELTS essay Many people tend to choose not to take vaccines. Many people believe that it is crucial to inoculate everyone for safety purposes

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
236 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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