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Many people saying cell phone is a blessing while other saying it is wastage of time and sources. /discussed both of the views.

Many people saying cell phone is a blessing while other saying it is wastage of time and sources. /discussed both of the views. KlKaM
Cell phone presents technology, invention, wireless, device, portable, coding, covering communication, discussion, sharing, chating, emails, providing entertainment, games, movies, music, shows shapping the world into a global village. In the present era, it brings education, applications, business, storage along with it generates vulgarity, diseases, and crimes. However, cell phone has it's own benefits and drawbacks to the people in general and to the society as a whole. Firstly, cell phone makes business healthy, accurate, profitable through time saving and confidence. Fo instance, a business man can check transaction, office activities while using online services of this wonderful device. Secondly, it brings informative, interesting, inovative colourful applications with multiple functions and plans. For a moment, one can easily download required applications through playstore shapping life verstile. Moreover, it has the ability to store pictures, documents, files, data despite of carrying a big machine computer along with. For example, eye cloud is a magical storage place for all kinds of files. In addition to that, it pollutes societies, cultures. norms, values through the concept of vulgarity and negativity. According to an idea, huge number of youngester become pray to vulgarity just by learning the usage of cell phone. At one hand, it causes multiple deseases physically, spirtually and mentally. according to a research, excesive usage of cell phone can cause maximum chances of brain tumor. At another hand, it spots crimes, terrorism, fear, disturbance, among society. According to an approach, maximum criminal activities are taking place just with the help of this device. In conclusion, mobile phone is with functions, profitable, space whereas it is with negativity, corruption and death. In my point of view, cell phone is an amazing machine depends upon once usage of it.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
presents technology, invention, wireless, device, portable, coding, covering communication, discussion, sharing,
Possible spelling mistake found.
chating
, emails, providing entertainment, games, movies, music,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
Possible spelling mistake found.
shapping
the world into a global village. In the present era, it brings education, applications, business, storage along with it generates vulgarity, diseases, and crimes.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
has
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (=it is)?
it's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits and drawbacks to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in general
and to the society as a whole.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
business healthy, accurate, profitable through time saving and confidence.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Fo
instance, a business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
transaction, office activities while using online services of this wonderful device.
Secondly
, it brings informative, interesting,
Possible spelling mistake found.
inovative
Possible spelling mistake. 'colourful' is British English.
colourful
applications with multiple functions and plans. For a moment, one can
easily
download required applications through
Possible spelling mistake found.
playstore
Possible spelling mistake found.
shapping
life
Possible spelling mistake found.
verstile
.
Moreover
, it has the ability to store pictures, documents, files, data
Did you mean "despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
despite of
carrying a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
machine computer along with.
For example
, eye cloud is a magical storage place for all kinds of files.

In addition
to that, it pollutes societies, cultures.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
norms
, values through the concept of vulgarity and negativity. According to an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, huge number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
youngester
become pray to vulgarity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by learning the usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
. At one hand, it causes multiple
Possible spelling mistake found.
deseases
physically
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
spirtually
and mentally.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
according
to a research,
Possible spelling mistake found.
excesive
usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
can cause maximum chances of brain tumor. At another hand, it spots crimes, terrorism, fear, disturbance, among society. According to an approach, maximum criminal activities are taking place
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of this device.

In conclusion
, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is with functions, profitable, space whereas it is with negativity, corruption and death. In my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is an amazing machine depends upon once usage of it.

IELTS essay Many people saying cell phone is a blessing while other saying it is wastage of time and sources. /discussed both of the views.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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