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Some people believe computers will take the teacher’s role, therefore, teachers will be replaced by computers. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people believe computers will take the teacher’s role, therefore, teachers will be replaced by computers. v. 1
f late, the trend of visiting new geographical areas has been immensely popular amongst tourists. It has changed the dynamics of world substantially. Many believe it to be favourable, for the localities as it brought many advantages, while others found it to be harmful to their culture. I would argue for the benefits, it brought. To Begin with, Tourists leave behind the traces of their marks. As, they explore newer places and learn about its cultural heritages, the chances are that, religious beliefs get impacted. Locals do not feel pleased about this change. For instance, in India, when foreigners visit the Sikh Temples, they don't cover their head very often, which is a mandatory ritual to follow. As a result, few local children tend to mock the same. Nevertheless, many irresponsible tourists have not been very cautious about the cleanliness of those places, they roam around. They do spread the garbage sometimes, out of their ignorance. However, this paradigm shift is beneficial to bring more diversities. When tourists roam around the different regions and inspired by their traditions, sometimes, they take it back it to their home countries. To illustrate, Holi, a colourful festival of India, is being celebrated in many countries across the globe. Moreover, one country's local religion has found a space to flourish. During the visits, travellers, who explore and understand the other religions, get inspired too. As it gains popularity, many secular countries, in need of skilled manpower, comes forward and provide them the required space to flourish. For example, in Canada, there are many Hindus and Sikh temples, being established by the Canadian government so that Indians do not feel isolated home away. In conclusion, this trend has contributed a lot, in the expansion of the local cultural heritage to a much larger scale, by enthusiastic globe trotters' great intentions and eventually transforming the world, as a small global village.
f
late, the trend of visiting new geographical areas has been
immensely
popular amongst
tourists
. It has
changed
the dynamics of world
substantially
.
Many
believe it to be
favourable
, for the localities as it brought
many
advantages, while others found it to be harmful to their culture. I would argue for the benefits, it brought.

To
Begin
with,
Tourists
leave
behind the traces of their marks. As, they explore newer places and learn about its cultural heritages, the chances are that, religious beliefs
get
impacted.
Locals
do not feel
pleased
about this
change
.
For instance
, in India, when foreigners visit the Sikh Temples, they don't cover their head
very
often
, which is a mandatory ritual to follow.
As a result
, few
local
children tend to mock the same.
Nevertheless
,
many
irresponsible
tourists
have not been
very
cautious about the cleanliness of those places, they roam around. They do spread the garbage
sometimes
, out of their ignorance.

However
, this paradigm shift is beneficial to bring more diversities. When
tourists
roam around the
different
regions and inspired by their traditions,
sometimes
, they take it back it to their home countries. To illustrate,
Holi
, a
colourful
festival of India, is
being celebrated
in
many
countries across the globe.
Moreover
, one country's
local
religion has found a space to flourish. During the visits,
travellers
, who explore and understand the other religions,
get
inspired too. As it gains popularity,
many
secular countries, in need of skilled manpower,
comes
forward and provide them the required space to flourish.
For example
, in Canada, there are
many
Hindus and Sikh temples,
being established
by the Canadian
government
so
that Indians do not feel isolated home away.

In conclusion
, this trend has contributed a lot, in the expansion of the
local
cultural heritage to a much larger scale, by enthusiastic globe trotters' great intentions and
eventually
transforming the world, as a
small
global village.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe computers will take the teacher’s role, therefore, teachers will be replaced by computers. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
315 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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