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Some people argue that technological inventions, such as smartphones, are making people socially less interactive. Discuss both views.

Some people argue that technological inventions, such as smartphones, are making people socially less interactive. NrGq2
It is argued by some that interaction between people is becoming less due to the advancement of technologies. In my opinion, developing technologies are beneficial and provides an opportunity to communicate without any geografic baries, while some people disagree and think that it leads to detrimental effect on interpersonal communication, especially on children. On the one hand, nowadays interaction between people is becoming easier because of developing technologies. Communication through internet allows to people being in touch in almost any place in the world. As a result, these days people who immigrate to another country or travel around the globe are almost not feeling loneliness without close people. It is because of a possiility to communicate with relatives and friends by applications, such as Skype or Zoom. For instance, according to the survey held among international students, 80% respondents said that they almost did not miss their parents during education in a foreign country due to possibility to speak with them every day on the internet. On the other hand, it is believed by some people that technologies lead to minimization of interaction between people in real life. In other words, society is becoming isolated from each other and prefer to communicate by smartphones or others up-to-date technologies. As a result, it has harmful effect on social skills not only of adults, who forget how to interact with each other in an offline life but it has particularly negative effect on children. Youngsters need to develop communication skills for making new friends and managing with other people in real life. For example, having carried out a study, it was found out by Oxford University that children who did not have smartphones before high school, were social more that who started using mobile phones for communication in earlier age. In conclude, new technologies has a positive effect such as communication is becoming easier between people who are far from each other, however it cannot be denied that interaction through internet makes people less social in real life.
It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interaction
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is becoming less due to the advancement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
. In my opinion, developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
are beneficial and provides an opportunity to communicate without any
Possible spelling mistake found.
geografic
Possible spelling mistake found.
baries
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
disagree and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it leads to detrimental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
,
especially
on children.

On the one hand, nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interaction
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
becoming easier
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Communication
through internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
being in touch in almost any place in the world.
As a result
, these days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
immigrate to another country or travel around the globe are almost not feeling loneliness without close
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a
Possible spelling mistake found.
possiility
to communicate with relatives and friends by applications, such as Skype or Zoom.
For instance
, according to the survey held among international students, 80% respondents said that they almost did not miss their parents during education in a foreign country due to possibility to speak with them every day on the internet.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, it
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
lead to minimization of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interaction
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, society is becoming isolated from each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
and prefer to communicate by smartphones or others up-to-date
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
.
As a result
, it has harmful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
of adults,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
forget how to interact with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
in an offline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it has
particularly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on children. Youngsters need to develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
for making new friends and managing with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
For example
, having carried out a study, it
was found
out by Oxford University that children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
did not have smartphones
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
high school, were social more that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
using mobile phones for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
in earlier age.

In conclude, new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
is becoming easier between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are far from each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
,
however
it cannot
be denied
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interaction
through internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
less social in real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
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IELTS essay Some people argue that technological inventions, such as smartphones, are making people socially less interactive.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
336 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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