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Some people argue that government should spend on their money elderly people care. However, other people say that government should focus more education for young people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people argue that government should spend on their money elderly people care. However, other people say that government should focus more education for young people. yX7bg
It is controversial arguments that how government funds are treated. While some people claim that governments should spend on their money on elderly care, others insist that they should use public funds for education for young people. I believe the level of importance is same in and therefore governments should equally spend their money both elderly care and education for young people. Some people insist that governments should use public funds for senior citizens because all of them can receive care. Nowadays, not all elderly people can receive medical care since there is a difference depending on their countries’ medical systems. In the US, for instance, many citizens who are poor have died due to COVID-19 because they could not afford to pay medical expenses and go to see doctors because Americans need to enroll in expensive private health insurance. However, others claim that governments should spend money on the young generation’s education because these young people will support future countries. Since youngsters have a high possibility to live longer than elderly people, countries can rear capable people. For example, Germany spends public costs on education and people can go to universities for free of charge, leading this country has increased its gross domestic product by 1. 5% in the last 10 years. As a result, countries will experience the development of the economy. In conclusion, I believe that government should equally spend their fund because elderly care and education for juveniles are both vital to save lives and to stimulate economic development.
It is controversial arguments that how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
funds
are treated
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
on their money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
, others insist that they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public funds for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. I believe the level of importance is same in and
therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should
equally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their money both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
insist that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public funds for senior citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
all of them can receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
. Nowadays, not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can receive medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
since there is a difference depending on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries’
medical systems. In the US,
for instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
citizens who are poor have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
due to COVID-19
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they could not afford to pay medical expenses and go to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
doctors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Americans need to enroll in expensive private health insurance.

However
, others claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
money on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will support future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Since youngsters have a high possibility to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can rear capable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, Germany
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spends
public costs on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can go to universities for free of charge, leading this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has increased its gross domestic product by 1. 5% in the last 10 years.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
will experience the development of the economy.

In conclusion
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
equally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fund
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for juveniles are both vital to save
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and to stimulate economic development.
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IELTS essay Some people argue that government should spend on their money elderly people care. However, other people say that government should focus more education for young people.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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