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Some people argue that employees should change their jobs atleast once in their life time. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people argue that employees should change their jobs atleast once in their life time. pRK1y
Changing career by workers in their life span is opted by many and it might be a positive approach for their development. However, some individual argue this by several reasons. I, personally, agree with job shifting and would support my opinion in forthcoming paragraphs. It is easy to cmprehend, why i support this viewpoint by two major factors. The preponderant is that it would help employees to inculcate new skills as each job demands different skills. For example, if a worker is working as a team leader in an organisation, probably, he may get new responsibilities in a new company such as, marketing and training. which ultimately, aids to new experiences and skills. The second major benefit of changing jobs could be related to finacial securities and career growth. To elucidate, If a worker is doing a similar job throughout his life, it may become tiring and mundane, and hence, reduce enthusiasim about his work. Consequently; effect persons permotion and salary raises. On the other hand, if an individual is changing his job more frequently, he play his role more intentively to secure his position in the new organisation, and this would surely help to get promotions and bonuses. Thus, shifting jobs not only aids to new experiences but also raise employees financial conditions. Despite these benefits, some workers do not in favour of changing their job because they get familiar with the working environment and company's policy, and hence they are living a smooth life. Moreover, some people could not adjust to new environment because they are introverts. Thus, changing career would never be a best option for them. In short, people who are afraid of facing new challanged with new jobs are always opposes this idea. In conclusion, although new jobs bring new challanges, it is necessary to face obstacles to grow in every field of life. I, firmly, believe that one should shift his career to get achieve their desired goals.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Changing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
span
is opted
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
and it might be a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
approach for their development.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "individuals"?
individual
argue this by several reasons.

I,
personally
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
shifting and would support my opinion in forthcoming paragraphs.

It is easy to
Possible spelling mistake found.
cmprehend
, why
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
support this viewpoint by two major factors. The preponderant is that it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
employees to inculcate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
demands
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For example
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
is working as a team leader in an
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
,
probably
, he may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
responsibilities in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
such as, marketing and training.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
which
ultimately
, aids to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
experiences and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. The second major benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
could
be related
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
finacial
securities and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
growth. To elucidate, If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
is doing a similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
throughout his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, it may become tiring and mundane, and
hence
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
Possible spelling mistake found.
enthusiasim
about his work.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Consequently
; effect persons
Possible spelling mistake found.
permotion
and salary raises.
On the other hand
, if an individual is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
more
frequently
, he
The pronoun 'he' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "plays", "played".
play
his role more
Possible spelling mistake found.
intentively
to secure his position in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
, and this would
surely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
promotions and bonuses.
Thus
, shifting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
aids to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
experiences
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
raise employees financial conditions.

Despite these benefits,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
do not in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
familiar with the working environment and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
's policy, and
hence
they are living a smooth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
could not adjust to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are introverts.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
would never be
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
best option for them. In short,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are afraid of facing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
Possible spelling mistake found.
challanged
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
are always opposes this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
Possible spelling mistake found.
challanges
, it is necessary to face obstacles to grow in every field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. I,
firmly
, believe that one should shift his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
achieve their desired goals.
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IELTS essay Some people argue that employees should change their jobs atleast once in their life time.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
324 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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