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Some people are happy to spend their whole life in the same area, others prefer to live in many different places in thair life time? Discuss boyh views & give your opinion v.1

Some people are happy to spend their whole life in the same area, others prefer to live in many different places in thair life time? Discuss boyh views & give your opinion v. 1
In order to live a cheerful life, people have different mentalities regarding the place where they want to live. For this reason, it is often argued by some people that spending the entire life in just one place is a feasible option, while others believe in moving to diversified areas. Although people might have varied viewpoints, I consider that there are some worthwhile reasons to favour migration of people. On the one hand, there are numerous factors why some people are interested to live in a single place for their whole life span. Firstly, lots of sentiments are attached to their birth place. Childhood memories as well as ancestral feelings restrict them to leave their hometown since people do not want to loose them. Secondly, popularity in the city where people reside for long duration of time is extremely beneficial either in terms of social status or to run a business. To exemplify, some shops in a locality are 50-60 years old, so shut down their well-paying shops to move to another city or state is a completely illogical decision. On the other hand, several considerations do make a sense in favour of changing hometowns or countries et Cetra. Overcoming monotonous life is one of the major reasons. Some people find it lethargic when they have to live in the same town for a number of years. They just want some change in the surroundings around them. Availability of better job opportunities is another major factor. If the jobs which pay a lucrative amount of salaries are available in other areas, some people will obviously migrate for higher earnings. In conclusion, even though the merits such as well-known society and preserving historical memories are gained by surviving and preserving historical memories are gained by surviving in same place for lifetime, I believe that to overcome boredom as well as increase in earnings are much more considerable in a happy life. Therefore, I support in changing home places according to the alterations in demands of an individual.
In order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
a cheerful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
mentalities regarding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
where they want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
.
For this reason
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that spending the entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
is a feasible option, while others believe in moving to diversified areas. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might have varied viewpoints, I consider that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
worthwhile reasons to
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
migration of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the one hand, there are numerous factors why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are interested
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
for their whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
span.
Firstly
, lots of sentiments
are attached
to their birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
. Childhood memories
as well
as ancestral feelings restrict them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their hometown since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not want to
Did you mean "lose" (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
loose
them.
Secondly
, popularity in the city where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
reside for long duration of time is
extremely
beneficial either in terms of social status or to run a business. To exemplify,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
shops in a locality are 50-60 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
shut down their well-paying shops to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to another city or state is a completely illogical decision.

On the other hand
, several considerations do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a sense in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of changing hometowns or countries
Possible spelling mistake found.
et
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cetra
. Overcoming monotonous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is one of the major reasons.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
find it lethargic when they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in the same town for a number of years. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
want
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
Consider using "the surrounding surroundings".
the surroundings around them
. Availability of better job opportunities is another major factor. If the jobs which pay a lucrative amount of salaries
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "is"? (Some collective nouns can be treated as both singular and plural, so 'are' is not always incorrect.)
are
available in other areas,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
obviously
migrate for higher earnings.

In conclusion
,
even though
the merits such
as well
-known society and preserving historical memories
are gained
by surviving and preserving historical memories
are gained
by surviving in same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
for lifetime, I believe that to overcome boredom
as well
as increase in earnings are much more considerable in a happy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Therefore
, I support in changing home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
according to the alterations in demands of an individual.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people are happy to spend their whole life in the same area, others prefer to live in many different places in thair life time? Discuss boyh views & give your opinion v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
336 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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