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Some people advocate death penalty for those who committed violent crimes. Others say that capital punishment is unacceptable in contemporary society. Describe advantages and disadvantages of death penalty and give your opinion. v.9

Nowadays crimes are increasing day by day. At the same time new Punishments are bought by court and cop. But penalty are vary by different crimes. Mostly judgements are gives perfect punishments for the criminals. But the punishments given for certain crimes are unjust. Some violent crimes are Unacceptable by everyone. These kind of criminals must be killed. Consequently can be prevent the violence crimes count. For example, In Saudi Arebia, Criminals of the Murder case and rape case criminals will killed in front of the public by the special cop. Hereby, will be afraid commit violence crime. Furthermore, In countries like this crimes count are very low. So giving capital punishment to the big criminals is the right think. Some people think that, capital punishment is not fair in modulation society. Because that is the rule in king's time. For instance, While anybody does the violence crime, arrest him and gives life sentence inside the prison. Killing the human is a huge sin. Moreover, if killed one criminal by a cop, what is the punishment to that cop? Whatever, it is the crimes will most chances to increase day by day for this method. In conclusion, If killing one prisoner is very terrible, Someone how to accept killing one innocent? So it is certain that crime will increase day by day. We have only one solution, that is also called capital punishment
Nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are increasing day by day. At the same time new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Punishments
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
by court and cop.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
penalty are
Did you mean “very”?
vary
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
Mostly
judgements are gives perfect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
for certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are unjust.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are Unacceptable by everyone.
‘These’ does not seem to match the singular noun ‘kind’. Did you mean “this kind” or “These kinds”?
These kind
of
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criminals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be killed
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Consequently
can be
Consider using the past participle “prevented”.
prevent
the violence
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crimes
count.
For example
, In Saudi
Possible spelling mistake found.
Arebia
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Criminals
of the Murder case and rape case
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
will killed in front of the public by the special cop. Hereby, will be
The adjective ‘afraid’ is used with ‘to’: “afraid to commit”.
afraid commit
violence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Furthermore
, In countries like this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
count are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
giving capital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
is the right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that, capital
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punishment
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
in modulation society.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
that is
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
in king's time.
For instance
, While anybody does the violence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, arrest him and gives life sentence inside the prison. Killing the human is a huge sin.
Moreover
, if killed one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
by a cop, what is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
to that cop? Whatever, it is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
will most chances to increase day by day for this method.

In conclusion
, If killing one prisoner is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
terrible, Someone how to accept killing one innocent?
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it is certain that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
will increase day by day. We have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one solution,
that is
also
called capital
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
punishment
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IELTS essay Some people advocate the death penalty for those who committed violent crimes. Others say that capital punishment is unacceptable in contemporary society. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of the death penalty and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
232 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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