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Some peole think that peole purchase things their on needed.So advertise is not needed.Do you agree or disagree.

Some peole think that peole purchase things their on needed. So advertise is not needed. gq08d
A number of masses suppose that notice is not significant because all people buy the items on thier wish. But, I partialy this statement. I will discuss both views in my upcoming paragraphs. To begin with, advertisement is essential for everyone. For example, sometimes when peole want to purchase the new phone then they cannot understand which model they choose. In this situation, they can easily watch the advertisement and collect te knowledge about cell phones. As in advertise peole explain features about any think with very good way. Moreover, they can collect the knowledge about new trends also. like, clothes. If people purchase these items, then they will achieve high status in thier society. Therefore, advertisement plays the vital role in peole'life. Probing ahead, Why notice is not important. Firstay, nowadays there are many advertisement shown on television and phones. When peole watch the new things on them they want also buy these items. But, when they purchase things sometimes they face the lose. For instance, in my village all peole was bought the new air condinner from add. On the contrary, few days later they do not work. In this time they face the big lose. So, these advertisement are not Vital peole can buy all things on their personal demand. To recapitulate, althogh notice creates the good and bad impacts on community. But it depends on peole when they buy any thing after seen from notice they should check firstly.
A number of masses suppose that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
notice
is not significant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
the items on
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
wish.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, I
Possible spelling mistake found.
partialy
this statement. I will discuss both views in my upcoming paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
is essential for everyone.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
when
Possible spelling mistake found.
peole
want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
phone then they cannot understand which model they choose. In this situation, they can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
and collect
Possible spelling mistake found.
te
knowledge about cell phones.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
in advertise
Possible spelling mistake found.
peole
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
features about any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way.
Moreover
, they can collect the knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
trends
also
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
like
, clothes. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
these items, then they will achieve high status in
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
society.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
plays the vital role in
Possible spelling mistake found.
peole
'life.

Probing ahead, Why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
notice
is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Firstay
, nowadays there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
shown on television and phones.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
Possible spelling mistake found.
peole
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things on them they want
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
these items.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they face the
Did you mean "loose" (adjective) or "loss" (noun)?
lose
.
For instance
, in my village all
Possible spelling mistake found.
peole
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
air
Possible spelling mistake found.
condinner
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
.
On the contrary
, few days later they do not work. In this time they face the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
lose.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
are not Vital
Possible spelling mistake found.
peole
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
all things on their personal demand.

To recapitulate,
Possible spelling mistake found.
althogh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
notice
creates the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
impacts on community.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it depends on
Possible spelling mistake found.
peole
when they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
Did you mean "anything"?
any thing
after
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
notice
they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
firstly
.
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IELTS essay Some peole think that peole purchase things their on needed. So advertise is not needed.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
243 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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