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Some parents say that smacking children is the best way to form children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some parents say that smacking children is the best way to form children. pdWm
Training methods parents choose to raise their children, has always been argued by the society and the government authorities. Some parents, for example, find physical punishment necessary in order to raise their children. This essay will argue why this approach is not appropriate and that it fails in terms of training children. Parents naturally hold the responsibility of preparing children for playing their roles in society when they come to the age. This preparation is not always an easy task for parents which leaves them with no other options but using physical violence against their own children. Some parents claims that the pain laid in smacking the children receive, will remain in their minds and remind them that all mistakes will be addressed with painful penalties. They also blame the government because the long hours of working the parents have to undergo, exhausts them to a level that they cannot spend enough energy or time for their own children to meet their educational needs in more moderate ways. That is how this group of parents justify the violence they use in raising their own children. While, some parents might agree with undertaking physical violence against children, science and psychology have repeatedly proven them wrong. Parents and the family are the smallest unit of the society which is responsible to support and provide children with love and peace. That is why some governments do not allow the parents to take actions and meddle in methods of raising children. Other than that, indeed, the pain of physical harms is proved to be able to remain in children’s mind and it might have destructive effects on their self-confidence. Children raised by violent parents are proven to be more likely to show violent to their peers. Which means that these children lack social skills and are not correctly prepared to be effective parts of the society. This essay argued why using physical brutality against children can have harmful effects on them and is not an appropriate approach to raise children.
Training methods
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
choose to raise their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, has always
been argued
by the society and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
authorities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
,
for example
, find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
punishment necessary in order to raise their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. This essay will argue why this approach is not appropriate and that it fails in terms of training children.

Parents
naturally
hold the responsibility of preparing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
for playing their roles in society when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to the age. This preparation is not always an easy task for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
them with no other options
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
violence against their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You should probably use "claim".
claims
that the pain laid in smacking the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
receive, will remain in their minds and remind them that all mistakes will
be addressed
with painful penalties. They
also
blame the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the long hours of working the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
undergo, exhausts them to a level that they cannot spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
energy or time for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their educational needs in more moderate ways.
That is
how this group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
justify the violence they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in raising their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
children.

While,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with undertaking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
violence against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, science and psychology have
repeatedly
proven them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
and the family are the smallest unit of the society which is responsible to support and provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
and peace.
That is
why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to take actions and meddle in methods of raising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Other than that,
indeed
, the pain of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
harms
is proved
to be able to remain in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
mind and it might have destructive effects on their self-confidence.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
raised by violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are proven
to be more likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
violent to their peers. Which means that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
lack social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and are not
correctly
prepared to be effective parts of the society.

This essay argued why using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
brutality against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can have harmful effects on them and is not an appropriate approach to raise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
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IELTS essay Some parents say that smacking children is the best way to form children.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
336 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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