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Some of the schools insist that all students have their own laptop in class to assist in their education Do you feel that this would be an advantage to students education or would it be an unnecessary complication v.1

Some of the schools insist that all students have their own laptop in class to assist in their education Do you feel that this would be an advantage to students education or would it be an unnecessary complication v. 1
While most employees spent their entire life working for the same company, many argue that it is better to change their job whenever they get a greater chance in other organizations. I personally believe that there will be a controversial effect if we will work for different companies in our whole working life. On the one hand, some workers want to change their job whenever they get a better opportunity in other organizations. They want to take a risk to get better salary and working experience. Most employees always seek to get a satisfied job by working in different companies. They can meet numerous people and have different working conditions if they will work for various organizations. For example, I want to work in a local company and then I will change to a foreign company to get a better salary and life experience. On the other hand, it is quite reasonable why people never leave from their initial companies. They can get a promotion if they will work longer in the same organization. Besides, people don’t want to quit from a place where they get used to the working conditions. They don’t want to start from the beginning again and I think it is the main reason why most employees always hesitate to change their jobs. For instance, my parents never think to resign from their present companies because they don’t want to deal with different situations in other companies. Moreover, some believe that they should have loyalty to their companies if they want to establish more successful life. To sum up, it is too risky to change our job frequently because there is no guarantee that we will have a better and successful life in other companies.
While most employees spent their entire life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
argue that it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
whenever they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a greater chance in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
. I
personally
believe that there will be a controversial effect if we will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
in our whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
life.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
workers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
whenever they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
opportunity in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to take a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
salary and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
experience. Most employees always seek to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a satisfied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
numerous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
conditions if they will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
.
For example
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in a local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
and then I will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
to a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
salary and life experience.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, it is quite reasonable why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
from their initial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a promotion if they will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
longer in the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
.
Besides
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
don’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to quit from a place where they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
conditions. They don’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
from the beginning again and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is the main reason why most employees always hesitate to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
For instance
, my parents never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
to resign from their present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they don’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to deal with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
situations in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that they should have loyalty to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to establish more successful life.

To sum up, it is too risky to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
frequently
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there is no guarantee that we will have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
and successful life in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some of the schools insist that all students have their own laptop in class to assist in their education Do you feel that this would be an advantage to students education or would it be an unnecessary complication v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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