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Some feel that we should work according to our passion, while others believe that we should choose an occupation according to our ability. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some feel that we should work according to our passion, while others believe that we should choose an occupation according to our ability. 0p7BB
It is often argued that people should choose their jobs according to passion while others feel that deciding occupations based on ability is the better. This essay will discuss both views and agree that choosing a career according to passion is the best answer. Many support the view that people ought to choose occupations which they are passionate about. They think that passion will make them enjoy their jobs and this leads to a more satisfying working life. This essay strongly agrees with this statement because money and success will come to the person who works with passion and satisfaction. For example, according to UK's statistics in 2020, the person who follows passion will have 80% chance of succeeding in career. On the other hand, others feel that people should better choose their jobs based on their abilities. They think that choose a suitable job will bring them a higher income and success. However, this essay disagrees with this idea because successful people who have creativeness requires effort to contribute and to learn after working hours, not only good academic results and simple knowledge and skills. Consequently, this may lead to loss of competitiveness which comes to lower salary or being sack. For instance, students who decide jobs based on what they are best at school have a lower salary than 50% of students with a grade point average under 8. 0. To conclude, although there is still argued about the benefits which a suitable career can bring, this essay definitely agrees with the idea that people should decide a job they passion since it will help them enjoy it.
It is
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often
argued that
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people
should
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choose
their
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jobs
according to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passion
while others feel that deciding occupations based on ability is the better. This
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essay
will discuss both views and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that choosing a career according to
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passion
is the best answer.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
support the view that
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people
ought to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
occupations which they are passionate about. They
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think
that
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passion
will
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make
them enjoy their
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jobs
and this leads to a more satisfying working life. This
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essay
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
money and success will
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come
to the person
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who
works with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passion
and satisfaction.
For example
, according to UK's statistics in 2020, the person
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who
follows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passion
will have 80% chance of succeeding in career.

On the other hand
, others feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
based on their abilities. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
a suitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
will bring them a higher income and success.
However
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
disagrees with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
successful
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have creativeness requires effort to contribute and to learn after working hours, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
academic results and simple knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
Consequently
, this may lead to loss of competitiveness which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to lower salary or being sack.
For instance
, students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
decide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
based on what they are best at school have a lower salary than 50% of students with a grade point average under 8. 0.

To conclude
, although there is
still
argued about the benefits which a suitable career can bring, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should decide a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passion
since it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them enjoy it.
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IELTS essay Some feel that we should work according to our passion, while others believe that we should choose an occupation according to our ability.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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