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Some employers want to be able to contact their staff at all times, even on holidays. Does this development have more disadvantages than advantages? v.8

Some employers want to be able to contact their staff at all times, even on holidays. Does this development have more disadvantages than advantages? v. 8
In today’s competitive world, employers want to be able to contact their employees no matter where they are in order to maintain smooth operations. This approach may have many positives, but it does have a few negatives as well. To start with, it is important to be able to contact an employee, especially during difficult times at work on in case of an emergency. For example, hospitals need to be able to contact their staff in case of patient emergencies, trauma and calamities. This may help save a life or many lives. In times of troubleshooting certain tasks, a phone call or email may save a presentation, project or win a deal for an organization. Certain organizations, call centres, for instance, need their staff on-call throughout the year. Any failure to do so may lead to loss of business and revenue. Contacting employees does not always benefit employers. To begin with, no employee likes to be contacted by their employer when they are at home or on holiday. This may invoke a feeling of resentment towards the employer. Some individuals are forced to work round the clock. They even take their work home. It leads to overworking, which may further lead to health risks and other related issues. Moreover, the worker may feel unhappy at his workplace and may even consider seeking job opportunities elsewhere. No employer benefits from an unhappy workforce as it may affect the growth and success of an organization. In conclusion, contacting a staff member may prove fruitful in certain situations, it may have a bearing on employee happiness and health. It could even lead to attrition.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s competitive world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
want to be able to contact their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
no matter where they are in order to maintain smooth operations. This approach may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
positives,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it does have a few negatives
as well
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to be able to contact an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
,
especially
during difficult times at work on in case of an emergency.
For example
, hospitals need to be able to contact their staff in case of patient emergencies, trauma and calamities. This may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
save a life or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. In times of troubleshooting certain tasks, a phone call or email may save a presentation, project or win a deal for an organization. Certain organizations, call
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
,
for instance
, need their staff on-call throughout the year. Any failure to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to loss of business and revenue.

Contacting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
does not always benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
likes to
be contacted
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
when they are at home or on holiday. This may invoke a feeling of resentment towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individuals
are forced
to work round the clock. They even take their work home. It leads to overworking, which may
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
and other related issues.
Moreover
, the worker may feel unhappy at his workplace and may even consider seeking job opportunities elsewhere. No
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
benefits from an unhappy workforce as it may affect the growth and success of an organization.

In conclusion
, contacting a staff member may prove fruitful in certain situations, it may have a bearing on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
happiness and health. It could even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to attrition.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay Some employers want to be able to contact their staff at all times, even on holidays. Does this development have more disadvantages than advantages? v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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