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Some employers think that formal academic qualifications are more important

Some employers think that formal academic qualifications are more important dq0g2
It is true that in today’s society employers tend to hire employees who are academically qualified than those who held more life experiences or simply good people. I opine that this change is a mixed blessing that has both benefits and disadvantages for some companies. On the one hand, it seems that by hiring more employees with academic qualifications can boosts a company’s development the way it wants. Since these workers have received proper education from schooling, they can contribute to the business by applying their knowledge that they have learnt from qualified field of works. These staffs are more trustworthy in terms of the level of education they have received. Therefore, by looking through the kind of degree that the person has, the company can easily determine if that is the personnel that they want in their company. On the other hand, it is equally important to hire experienced workers who own some valuable information from their pervious mistakes. For instance, if a company is facing a severe crisis in its developing stage, an experienced employee would be useful since he or she might have the knowledge of how to solve this very issue. Therefore, by having some experienced personnel in the company, it would be more likely for the company to tackle a major issue or avoid an unwanted situation.
It is true that in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s society employers tend to hire employees who are
academically
qualified than those who held more life experiences or
simply
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. I opine that this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
is a mixed blessing that has both benefits and disadvantages for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

On the one hand, it seems that by hiring more employees with academic qualifications can boosts a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company’s
development the way it wants. Since these workers have received proper education from schooling, they can contribute to the business by applying their knowledge that they have
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
from qualified field of works. These staffs are more trustworthy in terms of the level of education they have received.
Therefore
, by looking through the kind of degree that the person has, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
can
easily
determine if
that is
the personnel that they want in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

On the other hand
, it is
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to hire experienced workers who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
valuable information from their
Possible spelling mistake found.
pervious
mistakes.
For instance
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
is facing a severe crisis in its developing stage, an experienced employee would be useful since he or she might have the knowledge of how to solve this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
issue.
Therefore
, by having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
experienced personnel in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
, it would be more likely for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
to tackle a major issue or avoid an unwanted situation.
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IELTS essay Some employers think that formal academic qualifications are more important

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
222 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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