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Some citizens think that we should spend resources for protect wild animals, while the other think that it better used for the human populace.

Some citizens think that we should spend resources for protect wild animals, while the other think that it better used for the human populace. QLjj3
Some citizens think that we should spend resources for protect wild animals, while the other think that it better used for the human populace. Actually, we can share the resources fairly. So we can use it for human population and also we can spend it to protect wild animals. Human need the resources to make their population increase. Meanwhile we need it too for protect the wild animals. If we use the resources in good way, we can use it for both of them. Human have to keep their population stable because if it decrease or gone there is nothing to process the resources. However, if we don’t spend the resources to protect the wild animals, it will be gone and it can make the food chains broke. Use the resources to much in one way is also bad. For example, we only use it for human and we don’t think about the animals, we can make the animal’s population decrease. We can lose some species of animals too. But if we only spend the resources for protect the animals, population of human can decrease. There will not anything to cultivate and protect the earth. We need to use the resources fairly so there is no problem between the wild animals and human population. We can still protect the wild animals and human population is not disturbed. We live in the same planet so we need each other for our life. Sometime human need animals in their life and also animals need human for their life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
citizens
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that we should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
resources for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, while the other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
populace. Actually, we can share the resources
fairly
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and
also
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
it to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
wild animals.

Human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
the resources to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
increase.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Meanwhile
we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
it too for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
the wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. If we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the resources in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it for both of them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Human
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
stable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if it
Did you mean "decreases"?
decrease
or gone there is nothing to process the resources.
However
, if we don’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
the resources to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
the wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, it will
be gone
and it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the food chains broke.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Use
the resources
Did you mean "too"?
to
much in one way is
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
.
For example
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it for
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
human and
we don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
decrease. We can lose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
too.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
the resources for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
can decrease. There will not anything to cultivate and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
the earth.

We
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the resources
fairly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
there is no problem between the wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
. We can
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
the wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is not disturbed.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the same planet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
each other for our life. Sometime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in their life and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
for their life.
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IELTS essay Some citizens think that we should spend resources for protect wild animals, while the other think that it better used for the human populace.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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