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Some businesses prohibit smoking in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. Do you agree or disagree that this is the right course of action? Give reasons for your opinion. v.4

Some businesses prohibit smoking in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. that this is the right course of action? Give reasons for your opinion. v. 4
Nowadays, some offices have created " Smoking Free Zone" areas, while some government offices have completely made smoking illegal in public areas. Though some people consider it too strict, however as per others it is commendable. From my perspective for an individual' s health and surroundings, it should be mandatory not to smoke in public areas. For instance, smoking causes several side effects, which are injurious to health. it has widely seen that people who smoke regularly have a high probability of developing lung cancer, which is still not entirely curable. The treatment for cancer is very expensive and there is no certainty that the patient will be able to recover. Moreover, people who smoke regularly generally have puffy eyes, bad skin, and the appearance of an unhealthy individual. In addition to this, smoking does not only affect the individual but also to people who are nearby. This particular phenomenon is called " passive smoking" , which has equal chances of causing diseases related to the heart and lungs. In the public area, there are adults, young children, and pregnant women as well. If someone is smoking on the premises, people around that smoking individual also at higher risk. As a result, smoking affects the health of people who are nearby. Additionally, smoking also causes air pollution, which affects our environment as well. In the nutshell, to reduce the effect of smoking, for people' s health and environment, it is advisable that smoking should be prohibited completely from public areas. Government and authorities should encourage people to refrain from smoking and educate them about the harmful sides of smoking.
Nowadays,
some
offices have created
&quot
;
Smoking
Free
Zone&quot
;
areas
, while
some
government
offices have completely made
smoking
illegal in
public
areas
. Though
some
people
consider it too strict,
however
as per others it is commendable. From my perspective for an
individual&
#039; s
health
and surroundings, it should be mandatory not to smoke in
public
areas.

For instance
,
smoking
causes several side effects, which are injurious to
health
.
it
has
widely
seen
that
people
who
smoke
regularly
have a high probability of developing lung cancer, which is
still
not
entirely
curable. The treatment for cancer is
very
expensive and there is no certainty that the patient will be able to recover.
Moreover
,
people
who
smoke
regularly
generally
have puffy eyes,
bad
skin, and the appearance of an unhealthy individual.

In addition
to this,
smoking
does not
only
affect the individual
but
also
to
people
who
are nearby. This particular phenomenon
is called
&quot
; passive
smoking&quot
;
,
which has equal chances of causing diseases related to the heart and lungs. In the
public
area
, there are adults, young children, and pregnant women
as well
. If someone is
smoking
on the premises,
people
around that
smoking
individual
also
at higher
risk
.
As a result
,
smoking
affects the
health
of
people
who
are nearby.
Additionally
,
smoking
also
causes air pollution, which affects our environment
as well
.

In the nutshell, to
reduce
the effect of
smoking
, for
people&
#039; s
health
and environment, it is advisable that
smoking
should
be prohibited
completely from
public
areas
.
Government
and authorities should encourage
people
to refrain from
smoking
and educate them about the harmful sides of
smoking
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages knows nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Some businesses prohibit smoking in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. that this is the right course of action? Give reasons for your opinion. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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