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Some believe technology has done more harm than good. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some believe technology has done more harm than good. nEwrn
Nowadays, the technology bring people many useful things. However the citizens receive more advantages than disadvantages from it. We can't deny that the modern technology helps people for communicating and entertaining. They can use mobile phones to keep in touch with their relatives. Or they can entertain by listening to the radio, connecting the music to bluetooth speaker. In daily, citizens must use a fridge, air-conditioning or washing machine for their life. It is very essential for everyone. For the company, they really need to have computers and some other printers to increase work efficiency. In the industrial factory, thanks to modern technology, some processes become faster and easier, instead of the people. Technology has a big influence in the world not only their daily lives but also militancy, education, economy, . . . . In addition, there are some drawbacks of technology. The people spend a lot of time using the Internet and they don't have much time to go outside. Furthermore, some smart robots are becoming more and more modern and instead of people such as Robot Sophia of Japan. Therefore, the technology is regarded as a useful tool to explore the world, open new knowledges for people, but they shouldn't abuse it very much.
Nowadays, the
technology
bring
people
many
useful things.
However
the citizens receive more advantages than disadvantages from it.

We can't deny that the modern
technology
helps
people
for communicating and entertaining. They can
use
mobile phones to
keep
in touch with their relatives. Or they can entertain by listening to the radio, connecting the music to
bluetooth
speaker. In daily, citizens
must
use
a fridge, air-conditioning or washing machine for their life. It is
very
essential for everyone.

For the
company
, they
really
need to have computers and
some
other printers to increase work efficiency. In the industrial factory, thanks to modern
technology
,
some
processes become faster and easier,
instead
of the
people
.
Technology
has a
big
influence in the world not
only
their daily
lives
but
also
militancy, education, economy
, .
.
.
.


In addition
, there are
some
drawbacks of
technology
. The
people
spend
a lot of
time using the
Internet and
they don't have much time to go outside.
Furthermore
,
some
smart robots are becoming more and more modern and
instead
of
people
such as Robot Sophia of Japan.

Therefore
, the
technology
is regarded
as a useful tool to explore the world, open new
knowledges
for
people
,
but
they shouldn't abuse it
very
much.
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IELTS essay Some believe technology has done more harm than good.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
207 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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