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social media is advantageous or not

social media is advantageous or not MrRLq
Social media is tool that many people choose to consume their time because of its user friendly features. Social media platforms for instance facebook, instagram are used by youth especially who are the most dominant users of this platforms. Everything contains two sides of a coin. Many people believe that social media beneficial whereas other believe that it leads us to grave consequences. In this essay I will examine both side of the argument and provide my opinion. When we look at the positive aspect of social network, we find numerous advantages. Firstly internet community is a great device for education which helps us in various way. Through social website we can get access to lessons about educational topic which leads us to achieve desired academic performance. In addition, live lectures are also available in social networking service through which we can discuss about worlds recent issues and enrich our knowledge. We can still be presented in a lecture happening in Canada while sitting in Bangladesh. Despite having such unique advantages, social media is considered to be one of the harmful elements of society. Perhaps the main reason why people think that internet platform is a curse is because it invades our privacy. If we overshare our thoughts on facebook, the predators and hackers will target us to make a harmful effect. Secondly internet community hampers our education for consuming too much time on it. As a result the literacy rate in many country is very low as they are spending time in harmful palaces. In conclusion, it must be said that social media has become a complex issue with no easy solution. Having consideration both side of the issue, I would argue that social media is advantageous for us by using it considering the harmful effect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is tool that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
choose to consume their time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
user friendly
features.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
platforms
for instance
Possible spelling mistake found.
facebook
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
instagram
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by youth
especially
who are the most dominant users of
Did you mean "these"?
this
platforms. Everything contains two sides of a coin.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
beneficial whereas other believe that it leads us to grave consequences. In this essay I will examine both side of the argument and provide my opinion.

When we look at the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
network, we find numerous advantages.
Firstly
internet community is a great device for education which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us in various way. Through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
website we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
access to lessons about educational topic which leads us to achieve desired academic performance.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
lectures are
also
available in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking service through which we can
Did you mean simply "discuss worlds"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about worlds
recent issues and enrich our knowledge. We can
still
be presented
in a lecture happening in Canada while sitting in Bangladesh.

Despite having such unique advantages,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is considered
to be one of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
harmful
elements of society. Perhaps the main reason why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that internet platform is a curse is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it invades our privacy. If we overshare our thoughts on
Possible spelling mistake found.
facebook
, the predators and hackers will target us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
harmful
effect.
Secondly
internet community hampers our education for consuming too much time on it.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
a result the literacy rate in
Possible agreement error. The noun country seems to be countable; consider using: "many countries".
many country
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low as they are spending time in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
harmful
palaces.

In conclusion
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be said
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has become a complex issue with no easy solution. Having consideration both side of the issue, I would argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is advantageous for us by using it considering the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
harmful
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
effect

IELTS essay social media is advantageous or not

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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