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Smoking is a complete threat

Smoking is a complete threat 73GqX
Smoking is a complete threat to human health because it badly affects health’s smokers and the people around them. Consequently, in public places there have to be some rules to control smoker’s awareness and protect the health of those who do not smoke. I totally agree with that view and I will explain why. On the one hand, smoking brings a lot of harm not only to people's health but also to the environment. The smoke emitted from smoking is not as much as the vehicle, but it also affects the atmosphere quite a lot. Although accounting for only a small percentage of environmental pollution, cigarette smoke which is extremely toxic still affects the breathing environment of many animals and the photosynthesis of many plants. On the other hand, some people who are addicted to cigarettes will find it difficult to control themselves not to smoke in public places. That is the reason why the government needs to make more regulations and laws to prevent cigarette smoke from affecting the health of many people around. For instance, the public places should have signs prohibiting smoking and stipulating that there will be heavy fines if anyone violates. This could be proof that fewer people will dare to come there to smoke. In addition, some public places should also build private closed rooms for smokers and clearly state that they are only allowed to smoke there. because this will reduce the amount of smoke emitted to the outside and adversely affect the health of those around. In conclusion, I completely agree with the opinion that there should be stricter controls on smoking behavior in public places which have a lot of people.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Smoking
is a complete threat to human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
badly
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affects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health’s
smokers and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around them.
Consequently
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to control smoker’s awareness and protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of those who do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with that view and I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
harm not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to the environment. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
emitted from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
is not as much as the vehicle,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affects
the atmosphere quite a lot. Although accounting for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
percentage of environmental pollution, cigarette
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
which is
extremely
toxic
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affects
the breathing environment of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
animals and the photosynthesis of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
plants.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
are addicted
to cigarettes will find it difficult to control themselves not to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
That is
the reason why the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
needs to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more regulations and laws to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
cigarette
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
from affecting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around.
For instance
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
should have signs prohibiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
and stipulating that there will be heavy fines if anyone violates. This could be proof that fewer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will dare to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
there to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
should
also
build private closed rooms for smokers and
clearly
state that they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
there.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
because
this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
emitted to the outside and
adversely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of those around.

In conclusion
, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the opinion that there should be stricter controls on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
behavior in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
which have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
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IELTS essay Smoking is a complete threat

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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