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Smacking is the best way to discipline children. To what extend do you agree/disagree? v.1

Smacking is the best way to discipline children. v. 1
Disciplining children has become a debatable topic of discussion in recent years. Some parents believe that corporal punishment is vital to control and reform the behavior of their children. This essay will argue that smacking is a completely ineffective method. The parenting style in some families describes raising children through violent can maintain the children's behavior in a more positive level. Indeed, there have been some cases where a disobedient child behaves better, only after they have been exposed to physical discomfort. The fear and trauma of the incident are reminders for the child that the next time they misbehave, they will receive the same treatment; therefore, preventing the child from displaying bad manners. A recent study shows that 30% of Vietnamese college graduates had been through some forms of corporal punishment as minors. As a result, some parents are reasonably convinced that the best form of discipline is to deliberately inflict pain on children, thus entirely disregarding the emotions and feelings of their son or daughter. Although this method may work for some households, the idea of using corporal punishment is entirely unacceptable. There are far more civilized ways to educate a child without hurting or causing them any pain. Physical punishment should serve as the last attempt; as explaining to the child about the consequences of their actions will help them remember the lessons better, thus reducing the likelihood of their repeating the mistake in the future. As a matter of fact, it is reported that adults who had been punished severely as a child, tend to develop post-traumatic stress disorder from childhood trauma, and are more likely to be diagnosed with personality disorders. Overall, the idea of instilling aggressive discipline in children is ill-informed and dangerous in itself; hence it could potentially lead to a far worse outcome for the child. This essay argued that parents, who are firm believers in violent treatment, underestimate the consequences of what they believe in. In my opinion, smacking children is utterly unjustifiable and should not be practiced anywhere in the world
Disciplining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
has become a debatable topic of discussion in recent years.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
parents believe that corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is vital to control and reform the behavior of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. This essay will argue that smacking is a completely ineffective method.

The parenting style in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describes
raising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
through violent can maintain the children's behavior in a more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
level.
Indeed
, there have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases where a disobedient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
behaves better,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
after they have
been exposed
to physical discomfort. The fear and trauma of the incident are reminders for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
that the
next
time they misbehave, they will receive the same treatment;
therefore
, preventing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
from displaying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
manners. A recent study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that 30% of Vietnamese college graduates had been through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
forms of corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
as minors.
As a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parents are
reasonably
convinced that the best form of discipline is to
deliberately
inflict pain on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
thus
entirely
disregarding the emotions and feelings of their son or daughter.

Although this method may work for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
households, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of using corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is
entirely
unacceptable. There are far more civilized ways to educate a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
without hurting or causing them any pain. Physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
should serve as the last attempt; as explaining to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
about the consequences of their actions will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them remember the lessons better,
thus
reducing the likelihood of their repeating the mistake in the future. As a matter of fact, it
is reported
that adults who had
been punished
severely
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
, tend to develop post-traumatic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
disorder from childhood trauma, and are more likely to
be diagnosed
with personality disorders.
Overall
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of instilling aggressive discipline in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is ill-informed and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
in itself;
hence
it could
potentially
lead to a far worse outcome for the child.

This essay argued that parents, who are firm believers in violent treatment, underestimate the consequences of what they believe in. In my opinion, smacking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is
utterly
unjustifiable and should not
be practiced
anywhere in the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
world
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Smacking is the best way to discipline children. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
340 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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