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Should the death sentence be implemented globally

Should the death sentence be implemented globally jVyAM
As of today, implementing death sentence globally is considered one of the most sensitive topic in our society. Numerous amounts of people argue that ending someone’s life for a mistake or an evil deed is not justified. Thus, death sentence should not be applied, furthermore it should be removed. On the other hand, there are people who encourage applying execution. Getting rid of corrupted sinful people is justice, is what they would state. Therefore, this essay will focus on whether should the death sentence be applied globally. General Mahad of US Army states that applying death sentence worldwide will have major benefits. Also, he says people who receives this kind of punishment are considered hardened criminals who are ready to do anything, even murder isn’t considered wrong for these people. Therefore, executing them will be advantageous, for instance government spends plenty of money hospitalizing them, sending them to psychology treatment centers, also feeding them for a lifetime and housing them can put strains on government funds. Also, they are quite nuisance, due to the fact they are the worst kind of criminals, they cause disturbances and occasionally killing their fellow inmates at prisons. That’s why people consider eliminating them would be the best course of action. However, on the other hand, there are people who received life in prison, because their country doesn’t allow terminating criminals. These people in certain occasions change their life, due to the fact that they were given a chance. In 2002, a person named Lee in Singapore received life in prison for murdering 3 people, whereas he would death sentence in USA. However, he decided to take this chance and started changing his way of life. Even though he was trapped in prison he changed himself and learned 3 new languages and 2 professions, he also quit drinking and smoking. Additionally, he changed his fellow inmates, he created his own classes and taught them numerous things, as such as how to read and how to write. Now in 2016 he has 34 students(prisoners) learning from him and changing their lives. This shows why certain nations doesn’t allow executions because it gives them an opportunity to change into someone better. As I have shown, implementing It has its downsides and upsides. Although keeping inmates that should be executed can have adverse effects. In my opinion downright killing them is not going to solve anything, even if we kill them people like them will emerge in the future. Therefore, we shouldn’t implement death sentence worldwide. Helping them and encouraging them to change to be a better person is the best we can do. Furthermore, giving them chance to change others would be the best course of action.
As of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, implementing death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentence
globally
is considered
one of the most sensitive
Please check whether a plural form of 'topic' should be used.
topic
in our society. Numerous amounts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that ending someone’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
for a mistake or an evil deed is not justified.
Thus
, death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentence
should not
be applied
,
furthermore
it should
be removed
.
On the other hand
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
encourage applying execution. Getting rid of corrupted sinful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
justice, is what they would state.
Therefore
, this essay will focus on whether should the death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentence
be applied
globally.

General
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mahad
of US Army states that applying death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentence
worldwide will have major benefits.
Also
, he says
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
Did you mean "receive"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'people' should be used.
receives
this kind of punishment
are considered
hardened criminals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are ready to do anything, even murder isn’t considered
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
for these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Therefore
, executing them will be advantageous,
for instance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
spends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of money hospitalizing them, sending them to psychology treatment centers,
also
feeding them for a lifetime and housing them can put strains on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
funds.
Also
, they are quite nuisance, due to the fact they are the worst kind of criminals, they cause disturbances and
occasionally
killing their fellow inmates at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisons
. That’s why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider eliminating them would be the best course of action.

However
,
on the other hand
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
received
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their country doesn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
terminating criminals. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in certain occasions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
Did you mean "lives"?
life
, due to the fact that they were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
a chance. In 2002, a person named Lee in Singapore received
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
for murdering 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, whereas he
The word 'death' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
would death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentence
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the USA".
in USA
.
However
, he decided to take this chance and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
changing his way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Even though
he
was trapped
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
himself and learned 3 new languages and 2 professions, he
also
quit drinking and smoking.
Additionally
, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
his fellow inmates, he created his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
classes and taught them numerous things, as such as how to read and how to write.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
in 2016 he has 34 students(prisoners) learning from him and changing their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
why certain nations doesn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
executions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it gives them an opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
into someone better.

As I have shown, implementing It has its downsides and upsides.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
keeping inmates that should
be executed
can have adverse effects. In my opinion downright killing them is not going to solve anything, even if we kill them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like them will emerge in the future.
Therefore
, we shouldn’t implement death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sentence
worldwide. Helping them and encouraging them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
to be a better person is the best we can do.
Furthermore
, giving them chance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
others would be the best course of action.
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IELTS essay Should the death sentence be implemented globally

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
450 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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