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should the corporal punishment be an obligation or an option. give your opinion on that.

should the corporal punishment be an obligation or an option. give your opinion on that. kLKYe
In the past few decades the corporal punishment’s status has encountered a dilemma. There are two points of view which in one mankind hold on that the corporal punishment should be forbidden and in the other one folks insist on its benefits. Since the bodily punishment turns the kids mental health into a demon, I myself subscribe to the view of its disallowance. Although there are many people who broadly agree with the importance of physical punishment, psychologists and educated people are mostly in agreement about why the bodily punishment should fade away. It is crystal lucid that students of color and students with disabilities experience instances of corporal punishment more than their peers. The fact is that children who are beaten and abused are more likely to be prone to depression, low self-esteem and suicide. A school is a place where children are sent to educate and flourish not to be hit by a stranger. Opinions vary from person to person, a small fraction of people concur with the corporal punishment existence due to several reasons. They think the corporal punishment is a method of discipline for children. Moreover, they believe that children that are being punished, show more respect to the teacher and are less likely to disobey the rules. They also stick to the idea that there is a lack of father figures at homes nowadays so the teacher as a person who children are afraid of most of the time, can control them and prevent the bad behavior expansion. In conclusion, although there are both short term and long term effects of corporal punishment, it seems to me that sticking to the idea of forbidding bodily punishment is more logical. It is important to mention that debating and taking sides in such physical conducts will terribly affect the children in both negative and positive ways.
In the past few decades the corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment’s
status has encountered a dilemma. There are two points of view which in one mankind hold on that the corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
should
be forbidden
and in the other
Don't use the number 'one' with plural words. Did you mean "one folk", "a folk", or simply "folks"?
one folks
insist on its benefits. Since the
bodily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
turns the kids mental health into a demon, I myself subscribe to the view of its
Possible spelling mistake found.
disallowance
.

Although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
broadly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the importance of physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
, psychologists and educated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
mostly
in agreement about why the
bodily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
should fade away. It is crystal lucid that students of color and students with disabilities experience instances of corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
more than their peers. The fact is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who
are beaten
and abused are more likely to be prone to depression, low self-esteem and suicide. A school is a place where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to educate and flourish not to
be hit
by a stranger. Opinions vary from person to person, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
fraction of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
concur with the corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
existence due to several reasons. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is a method of discipline for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Moreover
, they believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
that are
being punished
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
more respect to the teacher and are less likely to disobey the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
. They
also
stick to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that there is a lack of father figures at homes nowadays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the teacher as a person who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are afraid of most of the time, can control them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
behavior expansion.

In conclusion
, although there are both short
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "terms"?
term
and long term effects of corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
, it seems to me that sticking to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of forbidding
bodily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is more logical. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to mention that debating and taking sides in such physical conducts will
terribly
affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
ways.
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IELTS essay should the corporal punishment be an obligation or an option. give your opinion on that.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
309 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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