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Should parents have strict control on their children

Should parents have strict control on their children okbmK
Recently, the issue of whether parents should use strict educational methods on children and put them into a strict routine in daily life is introduced widely in community. Two texts that deal with this issue is Jane Brown’s opinion piece ‘The skills to cope with life are learnt in childhood', which was published in The Herald Sun on 21st March 2021, and Jack Lee’s letter to the editor, untitled, which was also published in The Herald Sun on 22nd March 2021. Jane Brown’s piece is collaborated by an illusion of ‘Big Babies’ drawn by…. The texts target concerned parents in Australia. Both texts attempt to convince readers of similar contentions: the decision on the educational methods on children can influence significantly on their future.
Recently, the issue of whether parents should
use
strict educational methods on children and put them into a strict routine in daily life
is introduced
widely
in community. Two texts that deal with this issue is Jane Brown’s opinion piece ‘The
skills
to cope with life are
learnt
in childhood', which
was published
in The Herald Sun on 21st March 2021, and Jack Lee’s letter to the editor, untitled, which was
also
published in The Herald Sun on 22nd March 2021. Jane Brown’s piece
is collaborated
by an illusion of ‘
Big
Babies’ drawn by…. The texts target concerned parents in Australia. Both texts attempt to convince readers of similar contentions: the decision on the educational methods on children can influence
significantly
on their future.
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IELTS essay Should parents have strict control on their children

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
124 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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