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Should government pro ide healthcare

Should government pro ide healthcare KnYeN
Governments are facing problem with providing sufficient healthcare to their citizens. Some of the countries, such as Canada and Swiss, have successfully been giving free healthcare insurance which cover all of the citizens. That same action should be done by all the countries that haven’t done so. Governments should prioritize their people's health first because the people are the central of a country’s presence. Without them, the nation’s industry, economy, and civilization will fall down because there are no sufficient human beings to manage that. In this case, proper management with careful and accurate allocation of government funds is one of the solutions. The governments’ funds from another sector that is not really important should be diverted into a more urgent matter and put more of that money into healthcare subsidies. In addition to that, there is another way to be able to get more financial aid to the healthcare sector. The method is to make progressive tax from the income program. With this program, the government could make the tax cut rate higher for those with higher annual income to get more funds from the wealthy people and make the healthcare more affordable for those who simply can not pay for the insurance. Sometimes, as the insurance rates for people with low to middle income is much more cheaper than the average ones, the insurance does not cover everything for the hospital bills and eventually, when they get out of the hospital, they will have to pay the remaining amount of the bills that is simply beyond their paycheck. Having said so, with the healthcare program which is held by government, the purpose of the program is not only to create an affordable healthcare insurance plans, but also to organize an equal medical healthcare that covers everything.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Governments
are facing problem with providing sufficient healthcare to their citizens.
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
countries, such as Canada and Swiss, have
successfully
been giving free healthcare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
which cover
Consider using "all the".
all of the
citizens. That same action should
be done
by all the countries that haven’t done
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Governments
should prioritize their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's health
first
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are the central of a country’s presence. Without them, the nation’s industry, economy, and civilization will fall down
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are no sufficient human beings to manage that.

In this case
, proper management with careful and accurate allocation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
funds is one of the solutions. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments’
funds from another sector
that is
not
really
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
should
be diverted
into a more urgent matter and put more of that money into healthcare subsidies.
In addition
to that, there is another way to be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more financial aid to the healthcare sector. The method is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
progressive tax from the income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
. With this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the tax
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
rate higher for those with higher annual income to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more funds from the wealthy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the healthcare more affordable for those who
simply
can not pay for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
rates for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with low to middle income is much
Use only "cheaper" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more cheaper
than the average ones, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
does not cover everything for the hospital bills and
eventually
, when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
out of the hospital, they will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay the remaining amount of the bills
that is
simply
beyond their paycheck.

Having said
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, with the healthcare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
which
is held
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, the purpose of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to create an affordable healthcare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
plans,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to organize an equal medical healthcare that covers everything.
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IELTS essay Should government pro ide healthcare

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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