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Should foreign aid be given if there are poor people in own country? Some people believe that governments shouldn’t provide aid to other countries if they have poor and disadvantaged people within their own country. Do you agree or disagree?

Should foreign aid be given if there are poor people in own country? Some people believe that governments shouldn’t provide aid to other countries if they have poor and disadvantaged people within their own country. MMbRL
Some people argue that governments should stop giving foreign aid to less developing nations because there are enough poor people living in their own countries. However, it is widely agreed that the most needy people in the world should be helped. This essay will first discuss the importance of development aid and will then state why social services and foreign aid could both be provided. Firstly, foreign aid is crucial for many countries in Africa, especially to Sub-Saharan nations. This is because economies in these countries are weak and they lack private investments. According to the United Nations, foreign aid might consist of 60 percent of a country’s budget, that is the case for example in Uganda and Tanzania. Without development aid the most unstable countries would go bankrupt within a short period of time. This might lead to further problems, like wars. Thus, it is essential to continue financing aid programs which are currently running. Although there is a greater number of homeless and unemployed citizens in Western societies, it is thought that wealthy countries should take their responsibility for reducing global poverty. In my view, social services should not be offset with cuts to development aid. This would not be the will of the majority of western citizens either. For instance, in Finland, nearly 60 percent of people would like to pay more taxes in order to get better social services. In the meantime, the same people give frequently donations to charity organizations. Thus, it can be argued that both groups can be supported. In conclusion, although some people think that development aid should be cut down, I tend to think that foreign aid is the only way to end starvation and global poverty. It is predicted that the number of people living under the poverty line will drop within 50 years significantly if rich countries will continue to provide their help.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
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people
argue that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
to less developing nations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
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countries
.
However
, it is
widely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that the most needy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the world should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
. This essay will
first
discuss the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
and will then state why social services and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
could both
be provided
.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
is crucial for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in Africa,
especially
to Sub-Saharan nations. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
economies in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
weak and
they lack private investments. According to the United Nations,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
might consist of 60 percent of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
budget,
that is
the case
for example
in Uganda and Tanzania. Without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
the most unstable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
would go bankrupt within a short period of time. This might lead to
further
problems, like wars.
Thus
, it is essential to continue financing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
programs which are
currently
running.

Although there is a greater number of homeless and unemployed citizens in Western societies, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should take their responsibility for reducing global poverty. In my view, social services should not be offset with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cuts
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
. This would not be the will of the majority of western citizens either.
For instance
, in Finland,
nearly
60 percent of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would like to pay more taxes in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better social services. In the meantime, the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
give
frequently
donations to charity organizations.
Thus
, it can
be argued
that both groups can
be supported
.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down, I tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
starvation and global poverty. It
is predicted
that the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living under the poverty line will drop within 50 years
significantly
if rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
will continue to provide their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.
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IELTS essay Should foreign aid be given if there are poor people in own country? Some people believe that governments shouldn’t provide aid to other countries if they have poor and disadvantaged people within their own country.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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