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Seniors are now competing with youngsters for the same jobs. This creates tough competition in the job market. Unemployment rates are already high in some countries. And when youngsters have to share the available jobs with seniors, it creates more unemployment among them.

Seniors are now competing with youngsters for the same jobs. This creates tough competition in the job market. Unemployment rates are already high in some countries. And when youngsters have to share the available jobs with seniors, it creates more unemployment among them. pLeVy
The fact that many seniors still need jobs clearly shows that their financial situation is not good. This is a cause for concern. Seniors who don’t have enough savings for their twilight years are a social liability. If they don’t manage to find employment and earn enough, the government will have to take care of their healthcare costs. What’s more, finding jobs is not easy for senior adults. Many of them lack the skills needed for the modern workplace. That said, there are still some jobs for which companies prefer seniors to juniors. Even if they are not as tech savvy as youngsters, they have more experience. Also they are able to think with a level head. Because of these traits many companies still appoint senior adults. Seniors actively looking for employment is not exactly great news for young people. While it is true that they can learn a lot from the experience of older employees, there aren’t enough jobs for all in the market. The truth is that young people who often have a dependent spouse and young children need employment more than seniors. There are some solutions to this problem. Enforcing a strict retirement age will prevent seniors from looking for jobs. However, that will affect older people who are in desperate need of a job. To help them, the government needs to launch some welfare schemes and ensure that all the people who need assistance can have it. To conclude, when seniors compete with juniors for the same jobs, the unemployment situation only gets worse. The government can prevent this from happening by launching welfare programs for the elderly.
The fact that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seniors
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that their financial situation is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
. This is a cause for concern.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Seniors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
don’t have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
savings for their twilight years are a social liability. If they don’t manage to find employment and earn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take care of their healthcare costs. What’s more, finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
is not easy for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
senior
adults.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of them lack the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
needed for the modern workplace. That said, there are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
for which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seniors
to juniors. Even if they are not as
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
tech savvy
as youngsters, they have more experience.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
they are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
with a level head.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
of these traits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
still
appoint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
senior
adults.

Seniors
actively
looking for employment is not exactly great news for young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. While it is true that they can learn a lot from the experience of older employees, there aren’t
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
for all in the market. The truth is that young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
have a dependent spouse and young children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
employment more than seniors.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solutions to this problem. Enforcing a strict retirement age will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seniors
from looking for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
However
, that will affect older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are in desperate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to launch
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
welfare schemes and ensure that all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
assistance can have it.

To conclude
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seniors
compete with juniors for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
, the unemployment situation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
worse. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
this from happening by launching welfare programs for the elderly.
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IELTS essay Seniors are now competing with youngsters for the same jobs. This creates tough competition in the job market. Unemployment rates are already high in some countries. And when youngsters have to share the available jobs with seniors, it creates more unemployment among them.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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