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School education is important than family agree or not

School education is important than family agree or not gAqbd
Everyone has its right to learn in this world. Some people thought that school education is incredibly important than family education which a child receives form home. I firmly agree with this opinion that school education has more value than education from siblings and parents. I will further discuss it in essay. Firstly, school is a place where different types of skills of students improve by the professional teachers. Furhtermore, theses make the childs able to achieve their goals as well as help them to flourish their soft skills. Understanding of ethics, subjects, behavioural pattrens and many other types of things takes place in an instituion in the provision of qualified mentors. Students get chances to be strong in their sports and competition which held between the students. Secondly, students can pursue their jobs to fulfil their their basic needs and they get their ideas from the their teachers as well as surrounding age fellows. In a reaserch it is proved that school going students show positive attitude in a work place than of students which do not go school. Finally soft skills such as communication skills, interaction with other people are improved in the school the level of students confidence raised in decision making process in their life. In concluion, i strongly argue that people should send their students to the school, however family education is also very worthy but school is of great importance
Everyone has its right to learn in this world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
incredibly
Use "(important)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
important
than family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
which a child receives form home. I
firmly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has more value than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
from siblings and parents. I will
further
discuss it in
Did you mean "essays"?
essay
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is a place where
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
by the professional teachers.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Furhtermore
,
Did you mean "these"?
theses
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "children", the plural form of the noun 'child'?
childs able
to achieve their goals
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to flourish their soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. Understanding of ethics, subjects,
Possible spelling mistake. 'behavioural' is British English.
behavioural
Possible spelling mistake found.
pattrens
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other types of things takes place in an
Possible spelling mistake found.
instituion
in the provision of qualified mentors.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
chances to be strong in their sports and competition which held between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can pursue their jobs to fulfil
Possible typo: you repeated a word
their their
basic
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
needs and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
from
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "their teachers" or "the teachers"?
the their teachers
as well
as surrounding age fellows. In a
Possible spelling mistake found.
reaserch
it
is proved
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
going
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
attitude in a work place than of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
which do not go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
such as communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, interaction with other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
confidence raised in
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
decision making
process in their life. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
concluion
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
strongly
argue that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
however
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
worthy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is of great
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
importance
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IELTS essay School education is important than family agree or not

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
235 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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