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Richer nation should help poorer countries to improvement in health, education and trade

Richer nation should help poorer countries to improvement in health, education and trade Jlgak
Health, education and trade are the most important issues in each country, to improve the condition of country. It has been suggested, developed country should help to impoverish countries to improve the. Personally, I believe in some cases, such as health and education, poorer countries are needed help, but trade is an issue that completely depends on the government and people. Health is one of the main subjects in each country, and also it is the natural right of people, however, impoverish countries are not able to provide it properly, and in this situation, health scarcity could cause outbreak diseases. For example, Corona virus, is the most well known virus in this time, which vaccination is the only way to prevent the spread of this disease. Whilst, some countries like African ones, are not able to purchase vaccine for their people, and also the level of health is considerably low. As a result, other countries owing to the universal health should help to these countries. The other subject is education, which could be the pivotal factor of development a country, especially in health and economy. Although, it is the main task of government, poverty countries need help. Due to they do not have sufficient knowledge and teachers or masters. Consequently, to reach the standard level of education, rich countries should help them. In my view, improvement in trade is completely depends on the government and people, and other nations could not do anything. Trade development requires the accurate plan by considering on abilities and sources, such as mines, agricultural and other things. For instance, Qatar’s only source is petroleum, which by proper management they are one of the successful countries in trade, on the contrary, Iraq has high source of petroleum, while, it is one of the poor countries in the world, due to the lack of correct management. According to the reasons above, government is the main responsible of improvement the country conditions, nonetheless, they need help from rich countries to reach the standard level.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trade
are the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
issues in each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the condition of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. It has
been suggested
, developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to impoverish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
Did you forget something after 'the'?
the.
Personally
, I believe in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, poorer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are needed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trade
is an issue that completely depends on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Health is one of the main subjects in each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, and
also
it is the natural right of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
however
, impoverish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are not able to provide it
properly
, and in this situation,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
scarcity could cause outbreak diseases.
For example
,
The term "Coronavirus" (= disease) is spelled as one word.
Corona virus
, is the most well known virus in this time, which vaccination is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the spread of this disease. Whilst,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like African ones, are not able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
vaccine for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, and
also
the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
is
considerably
low.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
owing to the universal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to these countries.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
subject is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, which could be the pivotal factor of development a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
especially
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and economy. Although, it is the main task of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, poverty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
. Due to they do not have sufficient knowledge and teachers or masters.
Consequently
, to reach the standard level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them.

In my view, improvement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trade
is completely depends on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
nations could not do anything.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Trade
development requires the accurate plan by considering on abilities and sources, such as mines, agricultural and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
things.
For instance
, Qatar’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
source is petroleum, which by proper management they are one of the successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trade
,
on the contrary
, Iraq has high source of petroleum, while, it is one of the poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in the world, due to the lack of correct management.

According to the reasons above,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is the main
The usual collocations for "responsible" is "responsible for". Did you mean "responsible for" or "in charge of"?
responsible of
improvement the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
conditions, nonetheless, they need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
from rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to reach the standard level.
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IELTS essay Richer nation should help poorer countries to improvement in health, education and trade

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
336 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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