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Richer countries should help poor countries

Richer countries should help poor countries gAMDg
In today’s sophisticated world, everything is developing at a fast pace and the standard of living of most of the people has gone up. But, billions of people still fighting for their basic needs such as better health, proper education and sound source of income. I believe that the contribution by the richest nations should be more in this regard. Firstly, in the field of healthcare developed countries can support the under-developed countries in many ways. They can open medical camps in the selected areas of poor countries. In this way, it’s able to provide free medicines, health check-ups and health education. Also, vaccination programmes can be conducted for children and this in turn reduce the infant mortality rates. More over, financial aid can be given to open better health care facilities by collaboration with other developed countries. Secondly, the richer countries could provide assistance in implementing educational institutions in poor countries. This can be made possible through available funds and thus open new schools and other vocational education. These will increase the literary rate of the country and consequently the development of the country. Finally, the rich countries could open factories and multinational companies in poor countries. Through this a lot of people would get employment. Also, this will reduce the barriers to international trade and will help to lift up the country out of poverty. To sum up, The developed countries have many resources to help the poor countries. I believe that developed countries should help under-developed countries in all the fields.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s sophisticated world, everything is developing at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
pace and the standard of living of most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
has gone up.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, billions of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
still
fighting for their basic needs such as better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, proper education and sound source of income. I believe that the contribution by the richest nations should be more in this regard.

Firstly
, in the field of healthcare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can support the under-developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways. They can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
open
medical camps in the selected areas of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. In this way, it’s able to provide free medicines,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
-ups and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
education.
Also
, vaccination
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
can
be conducted
for children and this in turn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the infant mortality rates. More over, financial aid can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
open
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care facilities by collaboration with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
countries.

Secondly
, the richer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
could provide assistance in implementing educational institutions in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. This can
be made
possible through available funds and
thus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
open
new schools and other vocational education. These will increase the literary rate of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
consequently
the development of the country.

Finally
, the rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
open
factories and multinational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Through this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
employment.
Also
, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the barriers to international trade and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "lift".
lift up
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
out of poverty.

To sum up, The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
resources to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
under-developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in all the fields.
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IELTS essay Richer countries should help poor countries

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
254 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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