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Some people say that international tourism creates tension among people from different cultures while others thinh it helps them understand one another better. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that international tourism creates tension among people from different cultures while others thinh it helps them understand one another better. AJOJx
In this day and age, people hold conflicting views about international tourism. While several individuals believe that global tourism yield tension among people from various cultures, I would agree with those who think it provides them understanding of others better. There are several reasons why some people argue that international tourism brings up tension. First and foremost, some individuals pay a visit to other nations in order to settle but not for travelling. To illustrate, there are tiny groups of people who run away from their own country and settle in other country illegitimately due to the fact that they are wanted. This will lead to the fact that denizens from the countries where the wanted crimes move to may think badly about others’ comportment. Secondly, a few people who travel to other countries usually throw trash and rob items from groceries. This is attributed to their own perception which may be assessed negatively by other folk. On the other hand, I agree with the idea that global tourism assists people have a better understanding about others cultures and societies. First of all, the most crucial purpose to travel abroad is for holidays after several days of studying and working like a horse. By way of illustration, during the tour, people will interact and communicate with other citizens who have different cultures, code of etiquette, diets, etc, which provide them a better vision of their outside-world. In addition, apart from those who travel to other nations for the purpose of recreation, there are also a plethora of individuals who get there to gain more knowledge which give them a good condition to learn more about diverse cultures. To conclude, for reasons mentioned above, while there are a myriad of people believe that international tourism triggers tension among individuals, I hold the view that it gathers everyone together.
In this day and age,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
hold conflicting views about international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
. While several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
believe that global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
yield tension among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from various cultures, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it provides them understanding of others better.

There are several reasons why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
brings up tension.
First
and foremost,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
pay a visit to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
nations in order to settle
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not for travelling. To illustrate, there are tiny groups of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
run away from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and settle in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
illegitimately
due to the fact that they
are wanted
. This will lead to the fact that denizens from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
where the wanted crimes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
badly
about others’ comportment.
Secondly
, a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
travel to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
usually
throw trash and rob items from groceries. This
is attributed
to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
perception which may
be assessed
negatively
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
folk.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
assists
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a better understanding about others cultures and societies.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the most crucial purpose to travel abroad is for holidays after several days of studying and working like a horse. By way of illustration, during the tour,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will interact and communicate with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
citizens
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures, code of etiquette, diets, etc, which provide them a better vision of their outside-world.
In addition
, apart from those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
travel to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
nations for the purpose of recreation, there are
also
a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
there to gain more knowledge which give them a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
condition to learn more about diverse cultures.

To conclude
, for reasons mentioned above, while there are a
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "myriads"?
myriad
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
triggers tension among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
, I hold the view that it gathers everyone together.
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IELTS essay Some people say that international tourism creates tension among people from different cultures while others thinh it helps them understand one another better.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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