Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Rich countries should not employ skilled labour from poor countries, as poor countries need the workers more. v.3

Rich countries should not employ skilled labour from poor countries, as poor countries need the workers more. v. 3
Brain drain is a much-debated issue and many people believe that developed countries should not provide work for skilled professionals from developing or poor nations since they are better utilised in the homeland. I personally believe that this system should be stopped as it would make poor countries poorer while rich countries would be richer in long run. First, poor countries can produce only a handful number of talented people each year through their broken economic and educational system. The government and public money are spent to support those students and professionals and when they are ready to serve the country, rich nations actually hijack them. This is quite unethical and a majority of the migrated professionals serve the migrated countries than the countries they were born. This system allows the developed countries to have a large number of talented professionals, scientists, writers, engineers, doctors and so on while poor countries suffer from the scarcity of such experts. These talented and qualified people are the keys to the development of a poor country and they should serve their motherland. Second, a developed country already has a large number of skilled labours and expert workers and they can do quite well without alluring skilled professionals to come and work there.   For instance, the number of native astronomers and scientists in the United States is already huge and they could easily do without brain draining talented and skilled professionals from other countries. Rich countries have a natural obligation to actually send their proficient workers to work and train citizens of poor nations for the betterment of the world. Employing skilled labours from other countries is actually a practice that ruins the equilibrium of development in the world. Finally, many skilled labours that migrate to the first world countries often end up working in a sector which is simply irrelevant to their education and skill and hence is a wastage of talent and time. For instance, many doctors and engineers in first world countries actually work in a restaurant or drive a cab only because they were migrated from poor countries and failed to show their worthiness. They could have better serve the humanity by being enrolled in their original professions in their homelands. In conclusion, the better lifestyle and more money are the reasons skilled labours migrate to rich countries and this brain drain system should be stopped for the overall betterment of the world.
Brain drain is a much-debated issue and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should not provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skilled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professionals
from developing or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
nations since they are better
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilised' is British English.
utilised
in the homeland. I
personally
believe that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
as it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
poorer while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
would be richer in long run.

First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can produce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a handful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talented
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
each year through their broken economic and educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and public money
are spent
to support those students and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professionals
and when they are ready to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
serve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
nations actually hijack them. This is quite unethical and a majority of the migrated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professionals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
serve
the migrated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
they
were born
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
the developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to have a large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professionals
, scientists, writers, engineers, doctors and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
suffer from the scarcity of such experts. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talented
and qualified
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are the keys to the development of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
country and
they should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
serve
their motherland.

Second, a developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
already has a large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skilled
Possible spelling mistake. 'labours' is British English.
labours
and expert
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
workers and
they can do quite well without alluring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skilled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professionals
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
there.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
For instance
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of native astronomers and scientists in the United States is already
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
huge and
they could
easily
do without brain draining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talented
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skilled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professionals
from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have a natural obligation to actually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their proficient workers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and train citizens of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
nations for the betterment of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
. Employing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skilled
Possible spelling mistake. 'labours' is British English.
labours
from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is actually a practice that ruins the equilibrium of development in the world.

Finally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skilled
Possible spelling mistake. 'labours' is British English.
labours
that migrate to the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up working in a sector which is
simply
irrelevant to their education and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
and
hence
is a wastage of talent and time.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
doctors and engineers in
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
actually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in a restaurant or drive a cab
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
were migrated
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and failed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their worthiness. They could have better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
serve
the humanity by
being enrolled
in their original professions in their homelands.

In conclusion
, the better lifestyle and more money are the reasons
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skilled
Possible spelling mistake. 'labours' is British English.
labours
migrate to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and this brain drain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
for the
overall
betterment of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
66Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes

IELTS essay Rich countries should not employ skilled labour from poor countries, as poor countries need the workers more. v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
404 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts