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Research shows that overaeting is as harmful to people's heaith as smoking. Therefore, the advertisements of certain food product should be banned, as the ads of cigarettes are banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Research shows that overaeting is as harmful to people's heaith as smoking. Therefore, the advertisements of certain food product should be banned, as the ads of cigarettes are banned. 0Bl8B
Health plays imparative role in the life of mankind. According to a research, overeating is considered to have some detrimental effects, as smoking has. Thus, in order to mitigate this problem certain food products should not be allowed to be promoted alike cigarettes. To the major extent, I support the viewpoint. My inclination would be justified further in the ensuing paragraphs. The foremost argument to justify my viewpoint is against the publicity of certain eatable products. Some food manufactures claim in advertisement that their products contain vitamins and nutritions, albeit it may not be nutritious at all. Which means that the preservers might be used in order to conserve it for long time. Apart from that products might be pestisised. Subsiquently, frequet consumption of such eatables can lead to health related challenges. Such as obesity, Diabetes and Cholestrol. For instance, eatable products such as nuddles and pasta are frequenty promoted on television. Despite containing harmful ingredients the companies claim that it has nutritions and vitamins. Consequently through such products companies deceive consumers, that is why advertisement of such food products should be banned. Furthermore the promotions of eatables have such content that draw people's attention and allure them to consume such products. To exemplyfy, Cocacola. Nevertheless, other side should not be overlooked. As food industries are integral part of economy, banning on adverts of some eatables might affect its selling and reduction of selling can deteriorate profit of such organizations. Subsequently, it hampers the economy of the nation. To conclude, I believe that some food products aregood if consumed in limited quantity, but sometimes it causes unhealthiness. Thus, banning publicity of such products can be helpful to tackle the problems regarding it.
Health plays
Possible spelling mistake found.
imparative
role in the life of mankind. According to a research, overeating
is considered
to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
detrimental effects, as smoking has.
Thus
, in order to mitigate this problem certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
should not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
be promoted
alike cigarettes. To the major extent, I support the viewpoint. My inclination would
be justified
further
in the ensuing paragraphs. The foremost argument to justify my viewpoint is against the publicity of certain eatable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
manufactures claim in advertisement that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
contain vitamins and
Possible spelling mistake found.
nutritions
, albeit it may not be nutritious at all. Which means that the preservers might be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in order to conserve it for long time. Apart from that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
might be
Possible spelling mistake found.
pestisised
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Subsiquently
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
frequet
consumption of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eatables
can lead to health related challenges. Such as obesity, Diabetes and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cholestrol
.
For instance
, eatable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
nuddles
and pasta are
Possible spelling mistake found.
frequenty
promoted on television. Despite containing harmful ingredients the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
claim that it has
Possible spelling mistake found.
nutritions
and vitamins.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Consequently
through such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
deceive consumers,
that is
why
The usual collocation for "advertisement" is "for" not "of". Did you mean "advertisement for"?
advertisement of
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
should
be banned
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
the promotions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eatables
have such content that draw
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's attention and allure them to consume such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. To
Possible spelling mistake found.
exemplyfy
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cocacola
.
Nevertheless
, other side should not
be overlooked
. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
industries are integral part of economy, banning on adverts of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eatables
might affect its selling and reduction of selling can deteriorate profit of such organizations.
Subsequently
, it hampers the economy of the nation.
To conclude
, I believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
Possible spelling mistake found.
aregood
if consumed in limited quantity,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
it causes unhealthiness.
Thus
, banning publicity of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
can be helpful to tackle the problems regarding it.
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IELTS essay Research shows that overaeting is as harmful to people's heaith as smoking. Therefore, the advertisements of certain food product should be banned, as the ads of cigarettes are banned.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
282 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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  • Research shows that overaeting is as harmful to people's heaith as smoking. Therefore, the advertisements of certain food product should be banned, as the ads of cigarettes are banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?