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remote purchase of items has became a common practice

remote purchase of items has became a common practice 0aWy3
In the recent days, remote purchase of items has became a common practice. While it has impacted positively to many peoples life, it has also brought economic harm to other individuals. Firstly, most of these remote shopping takes place from Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp among other social platforms. It has made most people who are not social media platforms orientated to loose their relevance in their organisation rendering them jobless. For instance, most people lost jobs when covid19 was declared pandermic and people stayed at home. Shops were shut down. Nearly everyone who could have accessed to Internet resorted to online purchase through orders, and goods delivered at door step. This rendered sales representatives, supermarket attendants and shop keepers jobless. In addition, most shop owners shifted to online shoping marketing malls like Alibaba and Jumuia to sell their products. This has impacted positively towards environmental reservations. For instance, most people could travel using cars to shop. Because of online shopping, shipping of products is done in apool for various orders. Eventually, orders are transported to different people using one means of transport. This means less emissions to the environment as compared to all individuals using several cars to go shopping. At the end of it significantly reducing environmental hazard. In conclusion, there is an comparatively increased number of people are currently shopping online. For this reason, most people lost their jobs, however it slightly reduced car waste products emissions saving the ozone layer.
In the recent days, remote
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
of items has
Use past participle here: "become".
became
a common practice. While it has impacted
positively
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
life, it has
also
brought economic harm to other individuals.

Firstly
, most of these remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
takes place from Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp among other social platforms. It has made most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are not social media platforms orientated to
Did you mean "lose" (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
loose
their relevance in their
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
rendering them jobless.
For instance
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lost jobs when
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid19
was declared
Possible spelling mistake found.
pandermic
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
stayed at home.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shops
were shut
down.
Nearly
everyone who could have accessed to Internet resorted to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
through orders, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
delivered at door step. This rendered sales representatives, supermarket attendants and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
keepers jobless.

In addition
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
owners shifted to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
Possible spelling mistake found.
shoping
marketing malls like Alibaba and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Jumuia
to sell their products. This has impacted
positively
towards environmental reservations.
For instance
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could travel using cars to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
, shipping of products
is done
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
apool
for various orders.
Eventually
, orders
are transported
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
using one means of transport. This means
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun emissions is countable.
less
emissions to the environment as compared to all individuals using several cars to go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of it
significantly
reducing environmental hazard.

In conclusion
, there is
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
comparatively
increased number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
currently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
.
For this reason
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lost their jobs,
however
it
slightly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
car waste products emissions saving the ozone layer.
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IELTS essay remote purchase of items has became a common practice

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
242 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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