Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Relieved from the overloaded burden of homework in senior high school, many students go into college only to find that they have plunged into the sea of knowledge and without anybody telling them where to swim.

Relieved from the overloaded burden of homework in senior high school, many students go into college only to find that they have plunged into the sea of knowledge and without anybody telling them where to swim. dA0E
Relieved from the overloaded burden of homework in senior high school, many students go into college only to find that they have plunged into the sea of knowledge and without anybody telling them where to swim. Some people are filled with misgiving about university student’s free choice: how could they possibly tell, at such a young age, which subject is more useful than others and choose it as their focus of study in the next four years which are probably the most valuable time in their entire life? In my view, however, such considerations seem rather superfluous, for choosing a subject by students themselves is beneficial both to the students and the whole society as well. Firstly, as the saying aptly expresses, “interest is the best teacher”, which means only when we have passion for something can we do it better. A good teacher must love teaching and keep the student’s interest in mind, and a physician must love saving life before he can be humane and sympathetic toward his patients, while a pianist should be crazy about playing and then become a top-notch artist. Contrarily, a person not fascinated by what he is doing is much less likely to get anywhere in his career. Secondly, the boudary between “useful” and “useless” subjects is not that clear-cut as some people might have expected. Undoubtebly, science and technology is of paramount importance to the development of our world, but it does not follow that other less practical subjects like philosophy and literature are useless. While the increased knowledge about our body, for example, may help us live longer, a better understanding about history, culture and ourselves provided by liberal arts may show us what kind of life is more valuable and therefore more worth living. To conclude, rather than restricting the students to certain “useful” subjects, parents and universities should encourage them to study whatever they like to. By doing so, the students will be able to learn those things, be it useful or not, that really intereset them, and this is helpful to the future career of the students, and to the contribution they can make to the world.
Relieved from the overloaded burden of homework in senior high school,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
go into college
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to find that they have plunged into the sea of knowledge and without anybody telling them where to swim.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are filled
with misgiving about university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
free choice: how could they
possibly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
, at such a young age, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
useful
than others and choose it as their focus of study in the
next
four years which are
probably
the most valuable time in their entire life? In my view,
however
, such considerations seem
rather
superfluous, for choosing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
themselves is beneficial both to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and the whole society
as well
.

Firstly
, as the saying
aptly
expresses, “interest is the best teacher”, which means
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when we have passion for something can we do it better. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
teacher
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
teaching and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
interest in mind, and a physician
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
saving life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
he can be humane and sympathetic toward his patients, while a pianist should be crazy about playing and then become a top-notch artist.
Contrarily
, a person not fascinated by what he is doing is much less likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
anywhere in his career.

Secondly
, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
boudary
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“useful”
and “useless”
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is not that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
might have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Undoubtebly
, science and technology is of paramount importance to the development of our world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it does not follow that other less practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
like philosophy and literature are useless. While the increased knowledge about our body,
for example
, may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer, a better understanding about history, culture and ourselves provided by liberal arts may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
us what kind of life is more valuable and
therefore
more worth living.

To conclude
,
rather
than restricting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“useful”
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, parents and universities should encourage them to study whatever they like to. By doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will be able to learn those things, be it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
useful
or not, that
really
Possible spelling mistake found.
intereset
them, and this is helpful to the future career of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, and to the contribution they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
to the world.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Relieved from the overloaded burden of homework in senior high school, many students go into college only to find that they have plunged into the sea of knowledge and without anybody telling them where to swim.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
359 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts