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Recently it is clear that amount of serious crimes are developing.

Recently it is clear that amount of serious crimes are developing. dMW2
Recently it is clear that amount of serious crimes are developing. Sometimes using the death penalty as a deterrent is the best way to stop crimes committed (? ? ? ). Sometimes using the death penalty as a deterrent is the best way to stop crimes committed, but the majority of people note that other measures will be needed -On the one hand, it is possible to decrease the crime degree if the government (verb? ) defined measures. Firstly, vocational training should be offered to lawbreakers while they serve their prisons of the sentence. This will be an opportunity for them to find a job after they completed sentences. Also increasing their skill or out looking can cause fewer criminal activities in the future. Secondly, the criminals have to know about the aftermaths of crimes on social therefore rehabilitation courses have to educate them. How crime affects the law and order situation of the society are taught to them in prison. Thirdly, the government has to inform or educate the public to accept and adapt the criminals after their prison. On the other hand, some opponents consider that capital punishment is the best way to fight serious offenses. Honestly, nowadays death punishment is not using often. That is why they argue that the death penalty must be offered to crimes such as rape and terrorist activities to bring about peace and harmony in the community. It is logical to conclude that however people have various opinions about punishment for serious crimes, I believe that education system as rehabilitation courses, vocational training, also informed public to the adaptation of criminals help to decline crimes in the world
Recently it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that amount of serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are developing.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
using the death penalty as a deterrent is the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
committed (? ? ?
Loose punctuation mark.
)
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
using the death penalty as a deterrent is the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
committed,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
note that other measures will be
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
needed


-On the one hand, it is possible to decrease the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
degree if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
(verb?
Loose punctuation mark.
)
defined measures.
Firstly
, vocational training should
be offered
to lawbreakers while they serve their prisons of the sentence. This will be an opportunity for them to find a job after they completed sentences.
Also
increasing their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
or out looking can cause fewer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
activities in the future.

Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
know about the aftermaths of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
on social
therefore
rehabilitation courses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
educate them. How
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
affects the law and order situation of the society
are taught
to them in prison.
Thirdly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
inform or educate the public to accept and adapt the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
after their prison.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
opponents consider that capital punishment is the best way to fight serious offenses.
Honestly
, nowadays death punishment is not using
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
.
That is
why they argue that the death penalty
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be offered
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
such as rape and terrorist activities to bring about peace and harmony in the community.

It is logical
to conclude
that
however
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have various opinions about punishment for serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
, I believe that education system as rehabilitation courses, vocational training,
also
informed public to the adaptation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to decline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
in the world
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IELTS essay Recently it is clear that amount of serious crimes are developing.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
275 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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