Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Read and think about the following statement: pets should be treated like family members. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons to support your opinion. v.1

Read and think about the following statement: pets should be treated like family members. Give reasons to support your opinion. v. 1
We live in an age, where people love to take unhealthy foods, especially junk foods. Children from rich nations are having these fast food and become with heavy weight. It is undoubtedly true that, It is a serious obstacle to any nations. However, behind the obstacle, there are many reasons as well as effects from this. This essay will discuss both side and will share some possible solution to that complication. Nowadays, People become too much busy towards their work. Everyone always looks forward to make money and to earn this they works too hard. Sometimes, they don't even get enough time to cook for themselves, as a result, they force to take unhealthy foods. On the other hand, children’s from the working family had left no choice except to have junk foods. However, government from developing world are always trying to make the cities with full of facilities and to do so they have taken a lot of developmental projects. To make successful their projects they acquire open lands or sport grounds, as a result, children lose playgrounds and they become stuck at home with video games or television programs as their entertainment medium, so no physical activity done by them and it ends with gaining weight. Furthermore, restaurant business owner broadcasts lucrative advertisements to attract customers and people from all ages, especially the children’s attract from these a lot. As a result, they have it and put on weights. It is a matter of great concern that, gaining weight is not good for any of us, particularly, children ones. Whereas, there are many side effects while, having that. The major side effects are it produces many critical diseases like high cholesterol level, heart diseases, diabetes and many more. Particularly, little one with overweight become humiliated by society, gradually they make themselves separate from the normal ones. Additionally, it psychologically affects them and destroy their confidence level. In spite of this, there are some probable solutions to this Problem. First one is children must take healthy homemade food. Secondly, Parents should take their children’s in playgrounds to play. Lastly, parents should motivate their children to do some physical activity like to participate in sports in schools as well as in society ground, in addition to this, they should take a walk while going home from school. These are the possible solutions to get rid of heavy density complications. In summary, we can say that, taking fast food is not bad, but it should be taken occasionally. People along with children should do some easy exercise, so that, they might not achieve overweight.
We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in an age, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to take unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
,
especially
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
from rich nations are having these
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
with heavy weight. It is
undoubtedly
true that, It is a serious obstacle to any nations.
However
, behind the obstacle, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons
as well
as effects from this. This essay will discuss both side and will share
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
possible solution to that complication.

Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
too much busy towards their work. Everyone always looks forward to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
money and to earn this they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "work"
works
too
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, they don't even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to cook for themselves,
as a result
, they force
Did you mean "taking"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'force' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to take
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
from the working family had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
no choice except to have junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
from developing world are always trying to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
the cities with full of facilities and to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they have taken
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
developmental projects. To
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
successful their projects they acquire open lands or sport grounds,
as a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
lose
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
playgrounds and
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
stuck at home with video games or television programs as their entertainment medium,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
no physical activity done by them and it ends with gaining weight.

Furthermore
, restaurant business owner broadcasts lucrative advertisements to attract customers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from all ages,
especially
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
attract from these a lot.
As a result
, they have it and put on weights. It is a matter of great concern that, gaining weight is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for any of us,
particularly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
. Whereas, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
side effects while, having that. The major side effects are it produces
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
critical diseases like high cholesterol level, heart diseases, diabetes and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
Particularly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
one with overweight
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
humiliated by society,
gradually
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
themselves separate from the normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
.
Additionally
, it
psychologically
affects them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
their confidence level.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
this, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
probable solutions to this Problem.
First
one is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take healthy homemade
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Secondly
, Parents should take their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
in playgrounds to play.
Lastly
, parents should motivate their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
physical activity like to participate in sports in schools
as well
as in society ground,
in addition
to this, they should take a walk while going home from school. These are the possible solutions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of heavy density complications.

In summary, we can say that, taking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it should
be taken
occasionally
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
along with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
easy exercise,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that, they might not achieve overweight.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay Read and think about the following statement: pets should be treated like family members. Give reasons to support your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
433 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts